Tuesday, 31 December 2013




Its the last day of the year 2013, and firstly I will like to share my joy with you guys. Yesterday 30/12/13, I won the award as the "Most inspiring reader" on what I like to call my mother blog: www.janylbenylshares.com. Ms JB was the one who fueled my interest to write and put my thoughts out in the open via blogging cause she made it look so easy. Kindly check out the link above for my award. :-D

This is a preety awesome feeling for me and it has made me realise that as youths we shouldn't pursue just success, but rather we should chase after fulfillment and that way, we can have  success and a whole lot more.

As we close the doors of 2013, and enter into 2014, I urge you to set targets and resolutions for yourself not because you want to be successful at the end of 2014, but cause you want to be fulfilled. I advice that we set targets that as at December 2014, their attainment would bring not just wealth and comfort but inner peace, joy and happiness.

As young people, our dreams are quite similar, be very Rich, live very well, have a great family and die at a ripe old age. Some of us even adopt the "happily ever after" line of thought, But these award has got me thinking about what is important at the end, success or fulfillment?. Cause one can be successful without being fulfiled, but one who is fulfilled will definitely be successful. Which would be better at the end of our lives; to die knowing we were successful with lots of material wealth to show, or to die knowing that we fulfilled that which we most longed for?

Happy last day of 2013, see you in 2014.


Thursday, 12 December 2013

The Blackman was taken in chains across the seas, they were sold by their very own brothers in exchange for pearls, mirrors and cash. The white man of old came to Africa for one thing, and one thing alone: TO TRADE. With them came their Religion, their Fashion and their Culture. Many of them became so used to our wonderfully blessed continent that they made it home, refusing to return to the "illusioned Heaven" from where they came. South Africa was not unlike other Africa Nations where this happened. They like others were colonised for years by our brothers from across the seas and when the time came, they fought for and got independence. But I guess they were never really free just afterwards, as Years after independence the whites still controlled a major part of their affairs, subjugating the blacks to the minority. Imagine, the white man attempted to make the Black mans hell their heaven. Ironical.
I am sure that many youths of then had settled it as their fate to be minority, to be second best, to be less than equal, to be looked at as less than Human,  and to be second in a line of only 2. But one young man chose to stay determined and look his fears in the eye. He determined that it was better to die than to live another day in that death and so he made his choice. He chose to stand against the inequality caused as a result of racial discrimination, he decided to stand against the apartheid culture, he refused to be silenced by Money and riches, nor be bullied by the walls of  a 4x4 cell and the brutality served to him by the Zombie police men of then (who I am sure must have consisted of both the Blacks and whites), he chose to live his foot print on the sands of time and make a dent on the Universe. That Young man was Nelson Mandela, who at the apex of his youth (while most of his peers slept around with various women and enjoyed the best of a second best lifestyle) stood against injustice and inequality.
One of the most striking aspects of his life was the ability to accept his fate at all times. As whether it was when he was unjustly sentenced to Life imprisonment, or when he lost his Son to the dreaded HIV/AIDS Virus, he never let any of this change the course of his decision, but like the rudder of a ship, it rather made him fight more, it fuelled his dream to achieve more and it propelled his hopes to aim for more goals.
As we Honour Nelson Mandela in this week, I kindly advice that we learn from this epitome of greatness to use our youth well, cause even the Holy book advises that we use it well now, cause someday it will wear off, and then we will be feeble just as the Late Nelson Mandela was during the last years of his Life. His fights for emancipation from the slavery of the mind which later led to him being democratically elected the President of South Africa were fought for, struggled and won at the times of his youth.
Today 12/12/13 marks a week since Madiba left the Earth, and so permit me to end this post with a question: If you are to be great tomorrow, are you living right today? and if tomorrow were a gift, are you willing to pay your today in return for tomorrow?
Rest in the Peace of the Lord Nelson "Madiba" Mandela... you died  a true hero, and not just as a veteran of the war of the mind, but as a Victorious Warrior personified.

Wednesday, 11 December 2013



Barack Obama - Watch Now: Tom Hanks Narrates President Obama's “The Road We've Traveled”

Below was the speech given by the President of the United States of America, Barrack Obama regarding Late Nelson Mandella at the Memorial service yesterday. It is a really striking note and so I decided to share it with you great people. Do enjoy.

"To Gra├ža Machel and the Mandela family; to President (Jacob) Zuma and members of the government; to heads of state and government, past and present; distinguished guests – it is a singular honor to be with you today, to celebrate a life unlike any other.
To the people of South Africa – people of every race and walk of life – the world thanks you for sharing Nelson Mandela with us. His struggle was your struggle. His triumph was your triumph. Your dignity and hope found expression in his life, and your freedom, your democracy is his cherished legacy.It is hard to eulogize any man – to capture in words not just the facts and the dates that make a life, but the essential truth of a person – their private joys and sorrows; the quiet moments and unique qualities that illuminate someone’s soul. How much harder to do so for a giant of history, who moved a nation toward justice, and in the process moved billions around the world.
Born during World War I, far from the corridors of power, a boy raised herding cattle and tutored by elders of his Thembu tribe – Madiba would emerge as the last great liberator of the 20th century. Like Gandhi, he would lead a resistance movement – a movement that at its start held little prospect of success. Like King, he would give potent voice to the claims of the oppressed, and the moral necessity of racial justice. He would endure a brutal imprisonment that began in the time of Kennedy and Khrushchev, and reached the final days of the Cold War. Emerging from prison, without force of arms, he would – like Lincoln – hold his country together when it threatened to break apart. Like America’s founding fathers, he would erect a constitutional order to preserve freedom for future generations – a commitment to democracy and rule of law ratified not only by his election, but by his willingness to step down from power.
Given the sweep of his life, and the adoration that he so rightly earned, it is tempting then to remember Nelson Mandela as an icon, smiling and serene, detached from the tawdry affairs of lesser men. But Madiba himself strongly resisted such a lifeless portrait. Instead, he insisted on sharing with us his doubts and fears; his miscalculations along with his victories. “I’m not a saint,” he said, “unless you think of a saint as a sinner who keeps on trying.”
It was precisely because he could admit to imperfection – because he could be so full of good humor, even mischief, despite the heavy burdens he carried – that we loved him so. He was not a bust made of marble; he was a man of flesh and blood – a son and husband, a father and a friend. That is why we learned so much from him; that is why we can learn from him still. For nothing he achieved was inevitable. In the arc of his life, we see a man who earned his place in history through struggle and shrewdness; persistence and faith. He tells us what’s possible not just in the pages of dusty history books, but in our own lives as well.
Mandela showed us the power of action; of taking risks on behalf of our ideals. Perhaps Madiba was right that he inherited, “a proud rebelliousness, a stubborn sense of fairness” from his father. Certainly he shared with millions of black and colored South Africans the anger born of, “a thousand slights, a thousand indignities, a thousand unremembered moments…a desire to fight the system that imprisoned my people.”
But like other early giants of the ANC – the Sisulus and Tambos – Madiba disciplined his anger; and channeled his desire to fight into organization, and platforms, and strategies for action, so men and women could stand-up for their dignity. Moreover, he accepted the consequences of his actions, knowing that standing up to powerful interests and injustice carries a price. “I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination,” he said at his 1964 trial. “I’ve cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.”


Mandela taught us the power of action, but also ideas; the importance of reason and arguments; the need to study not only those you agree with, but those who you don’t. He understood that ideas cannot be contained by prison walls, or extinguished by a sniper’s bullet. He turned his trial into an indictment of apartheid because of his eloquence and passion, but also his training as an advocate. He used decades in prison to sharpen his arguments, but also to spread his thirst for knowledge to others in the movement. And he learned the language and customs of his oppressor so that one day he might better convey to them how their own freedom depended upon his.
Mandela demonstrated that action and ideas are not enough; no matter how right, they must be chiseled into laws and institutions. He was practical, testing his beliefs against the hard surface of circumstance and history. On core principles he was unyielding, which is why he could rebuff offers of conditional release, reminding the Apartheid regime that, “prisoners cannot enter into contracts.” But as he showed in painstaking negotiations to transfer power and draft new laws, he was not afraid to compromise for the sake of a larger goal. And because he was not only a leader of a movement, but a skillful politician, the Constitution that emerged was worthy of this multiracial democracy; true to his vision of laws that protect minority as well as majority rights, and the precious freedoms of every South African.

Finally, Mandela understood the ties that bind the human spirit. There is a word in South Africa- Ubuntu – that describes his greatest gift: his recognition that we are all bound together in ways that can be invisible to the eye; that there is a oneness to humanity; that we achieve ourselves by sharing ourselves with others, and caring for those around us. We can never know how much of this was innate in him, or how much of was shaped and burnished in a dark, solitary cell. But we remember the gestures, large and small – introducing his jailors as honored guests at his inauguration; taking the pitch in a Springbok uniform; turning his family’s heartbreak into a call to confront HIV/AIDS – that revealed the depth of his empathy and understanding. He not only embodied Ubuntu; he taught millions to find that truth within themselves. It took a man like Madiba to free not just the prisoner, but the jailor as well; to show that you must trust others so that they may trust you; to teach that reconciliation is not a matter of ignoring a cruel past, but a means of confronting it with inclusion, generosity and truth. He changed laws, but also hearts.
For the people of South Africa, for those he inspired around the globe – Madiba’s passing is rightly a time of mourning, and a time to celebrate his heroic life. But I believe it should also prompt in each of us a time for self-reflection. With honesty, regardless of our station or circumstance, we must ask: how well have I applied his lessons in my own life?
It is a question I ask myself – as a man and as a President. We know that like South Africa, the United States had to overcome centuries of racial subjugation. As was true here, it took the sacrifice of countless people – known and unknown – to see the dawn of a new day. Michelle and I are the beneficiaries of that struggle. But in America and South Africa, and countries around the globe, we cannot allow our progress to cloud the fact that our work is not done. The struggles that follow the victory of formal equality and universal franchise may not be as filled with drama and moral clarity as those that came before, but they are no less important. For around the world today, we still see children suffering from hunger, and disease; run-down schools, and few prospects for the future. Around the world today, men and women are still imprisoned for their political beliefs; and are still persecuted for what they look like, or how they worship, or who they love.
We, too, must act on behalf of justice. We, too, must act on behalf of peace. There are too many of us who happily embrace Madiba’s legacy of racial reconciliation, but passionately resist even modest reforms that would challenge chronic poverty and growing inequality. There are too many leaders who claim solidarity with Madiba’s struggle for freedom, but do not tolerate dissent from their own people. And there are too many of us who stand on the sidelines, comfortable in complacency or cynicism when our voices must be heard.
The questions we face today – how to promote equality and justice; to uphold freedom and human rights; to end conflict and sectarian war – do not have easy answers. But there were no easy answers in front of that child in Qunu. Nelson Mandela reminds us that it always seems impossible until it is done. South Africa shows us that is true. South Africa shows us we can change. We can choose to live in a world defined not by our differences, but by our common hopes. We can choose a world defined not by conflict, but by peace and justice and opportunity.
We will never see the likes of Nelson Mandela again. But let me say to the young people of Africa, and young people around the world – you can make his life’s work your own. Over thirty years ago, while still a student, I learned of Mandela and the struggles in this land. It stirred something in me. It woke me up to my responsibilities – to others, and to myself – and set me on an improbable journey that finds me here today. And while I will always fall short of Madiba’s example, he makes me want to be better. He speaks to what is best inside us. After this great liberator is laid to rest; when we have returned to our cities and villages, and rejoined our daily routines, let us search then for his strength – for his largeness of spirit – somewhere inside ourselves. And when the night grows dark, when injustice weighs heavy on our hearts, or our best laid plans seem beyond our reach – think of Madiba, and the words that brought him comfort within the four walls of a cell:
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
What a great soul it was. We will miss him deeply. May God bless the memory of Nelson Mandela. May God bless the people of South Africa.”

From us at Young and Confused: Rest in Peace sir... >sad face<


culled from www.bellanaija,com

Friday, 15 November 2013


3 days ago was my Birthday(12th November) and so I am still in a bit of a "BIRTHDAY MOOD" **Shines teeth. Today my heart is drawn to share with you what i tag a "Faulty Thought process", one that i think should be re-adjusted amongst this great Generation of youths named You and I.

Growing up as a child, I vividly remember my Teachers asking our Primary 2 class WHAT we wanted to be when we grew older. With so much enthusiasm that could be felt in the class as much as the Harmattan cold, I would hear responses like: Aunty I wanna be a Pilot, I wanna be a Doctor, I wanna be a Teacher et al.... Our teachers back then would smile and tell us how we could truely be all we wanted to be#kudostothem. I remember how many times I promised my mother I would buy her a Limousine from my huge returns as an Engineer. heheheh #smallmindBigdrerams. To us back then, life was just plain simple; Go to school, graduate, build a big house, get married have loads of kids and live hapily ever after.

But age has proven me wrong, and to an extent has proven my numerous child Life teachers and guardians wrong cause now I know better. Life is not about "What we are" The Job, the Title we bear, the Degree we attained upon graduation, the course we studied(y) et al, its about "WHO WE ARE". In a world containing Billions of people, we have millions of Engineers, Doctors, Lawyers etc that are Broke failures. Why? Aren't they working hard enough? Figured that its simply because they focused on their fancy artificial Profession and not their original God given Personality. If we would only sit down and ask ourselves as youths who we want to be in the nearest future, we would have a clearer vision.

I heard something this week that had me thinking, it said:

"Greatness is achieved simply by setting a goal and being willing to die for that goal"

What better way is there for us to set a goal than to draw a picture of Who we want to be and not write numerous application letters for What we want to be.

Please dont get me wrong, Profession is very important!!! But permit me to state that it is our personality that drives our success in our chosen Profession. So if you set out to be the best Engineer, Computer Scientist, Business man, Doctor or Lawyer, it is the "Who you are" that drives the "What you do"...

Finaly, please Always remember that you can be whatever you want to be with a great Education, and a great Job, but you can also succeed without it as it is your personality that produces results, success, fame, Money etc and not your Proffession.

Thank you so much for your time, and please remember that "You are the Best there is..." #JdB

Wednesday, 24 July 2013

Recently, I was thinking of what area of life to channel this wonderful piece of Idea (My Beloved Blog) towards, I thought to make it a Gossip Blog, but in as much as I love to write, gossip has never been my thing (plus Na woman wahala/ Job be that), I thought to make it a Tech site, but that would crumble in weeks as I was sure to run out of ideas. Well out of the deep blue confusion I was swimming in, came an Old Idea which had been on my mind for quite a while in the past. It seemed to just re-appear out of the blues like the way spirits appear in Nigerian Movies. lol

“Let’s make it an inspirational blog”
That was my IdeaI Almost started shouting “Eureka, Eureka” like old uncle Einstein my great, great, great grand uncle did (Do not blame me nah, Success has brothers in the strangest places)
Well Still on the matter, I aim at making it a place to share growing up issues between you and me, a place where you can read about every aspect of growing up life and a place where you would meet people with blessed like minds like you. To this effect, the name Young and Confused has been introduced.
Over the years growing up taught me a lot of things which I wish I didn’t have to wait for experience to teach me but unfortunately I had to. My aim is to make this Blog encircle around things that are related with growing up from the Early teenage life to the early age of Youth life, things only very few parents or Friends would discuss with you.
Stay tuned and touch the Mouse not lol.

Friday, 19 July 2013


In life I have heard tales of people go on, and on, and on, complaining about what they do not have, what they do not like, what they do not enjoy being done to them and all. (I must say that sometimes it becomes a burden even listening to them). The truth is that Complaining is one of the easiest things to do, because just any one can complain. Anyone can complain about the life he/she does not have, or about things they hate. But very few people look for the possible good in the midst of the so called “problems”. We all want to have better Jobs, finer girlfriends/ Boyfriends, bigger houses and even some of us worry about minute things like digital devices. I once heard a young man say oh! I am tired of this Java phone I want an Android! Absurd it seems but that’s Life.  Life is a mystery. The level of want is as deep as Hell itself, it never gets satisfied. Man just wants and wants and wants. Why don’t we just stop for a while and think of a way to actually appreciate the moment? Do you notice that what you complain about you actually stop enjoying? Do you notice how much complaining drains your Energy and makes you feel like a dying Rose? I don’t think anyone wants to be inefficient or drained, so I have a simple solution to your problem!  


Appreciate here and now, as against complain, be thankful to GOD for what you have and even what you do not have”


I tried to do so once in my life and the turnaround was fantastic. I started to add weight as an end result ;-) . I began smiling more and in turn Life in General became more perfect.


My little nuggets for all of us with which I will end today’s Heart of Gold session is:


“The man who wants more, must strive harder than the others who like wisely want more, but first must appreciate that which he has and where he is”


F.N: I do not believe in the thoughts of people who say that Diabolic means hamper their success. I mean, he who works hard, GOD will bless and he whom GOD blesses the devil cannot stop.


Now as you start the weekend, let’s try to make it a point of duty to become better, work harder and enjoy NOW in our life as this is all we have. Go out, have fun, club, hang-out with friends, throw a party, go see your parents etc but no matter what, DO NOT COMPLAIN


Thursday, 18 July 2013


So officially, let me use this great opportunity to welcome you to JdB's Blog. It is without DoubT going to be a wonderful life time with You and me Together! :-)
So what better way is there to start a Project than With GOD? "So therefore" as my Lecturers back in my University days would say while solving Engineering Maths: my first Post is going to be about an upcoming Christian Event... ;-)
The Creative Thinkers (A set of focused, Devoted,  Blessed, and life impacting youths) Present a Life Changing Seminar Tagged:
DATE: July 19 2013
VENUE: R.C.C.G Grace Assembly: No. 1 Dipe Olu street opposite Airport Hotel, behind Tanterlizers, Allen Ikeja, Lagos.
TIME: 10 A.M (No African time oh!!! :-o )
Guest Speakers Include: Mrs. Love Oyedepo Ogah (Sure that you recognise the surname), Pastor Ubong Ntia (The Registrar of Covenant University) as well as Pastor Nkem Chima (Senior Pastor of Pennacle Teens Lagos)
It promises to be a life changing event, plus there is gonna be Lots to Eat and Drink, so hey! You stand nothing to loose, rather than gain a greater Future.
Be there oh!