Monday, 21 July 2014

Dad was always right...



Good morning great young mind, Ki lo happen (means what’s happening in Yoruba)? What's cracking? How was the weekend? Hope and Trust that everything turned up wella for you oh! ;) Well if it didn't, then just know that everybody has a Time-table, so your days of Fun are just around the corner. Nna this Monday thing ehn!!! Nawa oh! If I tell you I don't like Mondays ehnnn, mehnn Believe me :(. mcheew I just wish Mondays could be Public Holidays sef. More annoying is that of recent, my Fridays have become surprisingly more stressful than my Mondays, And I am like JdB your case ehnn, when you suppose groove na him dey hard pass.

Firstly, I would like to say a heart filled thank you for all the love, and kind words you wonderful great minds gave us on the celebration of our 1st year Anniversary. Words cant explain the joy you made us feel. Thanks guys, as you are why we write. There is no us with without you. xx #IOUguysalot.


So my Dad and I are doing this very interesting project that involves us traveling to the very end of Lagos on Saturdays, so my life recently got harder. I first have to go shopping at that survival of the fittest market, go on the Saturday Israelite Journey, and then go back home to cook Saturday Soup and stew. You needed to see me last Saturday ehn… I was so tired, that I was sleep cooking. Anyways, my compensation was that I could take as much Meat as I could in the name of Testing testing.. hehehe Na where man work him go chop nah. :)


On on our trip last Saturday, I sat in our old Limousine (well that car has seen its own growing up years and finish) and I just looked on. I then glanced at my Dads hand as he gripped the steering like he was holding a woman, and was thrown back on memory lane. I was thrown back to my childhood, when I was always given that “Junior you are too young to understand, but one day, you will” treatment. My! I always cringed when they told or did that to me. I mean I was 15 going on 16 you know? ready to take on the world, my hormones raging, was in love for the first time as I had just met T, had just gotten my first phone, and was at the Einstein “I too sabi" point of my life. And yet they say “I Was too young to understand” Nawa o. I grew up with 3 major phrases in my House, so permit me to share them with you today…



Do you think I pluck money from Tress?
Yep.. This one was on replay. I asked for money from my Dad more than my Mother did sef


Growing up, Dad always gave us a big amount of Money as our monthly sit don dey look allowance. It was One thousand Naira (N 1,000) monthly to be precise. Now this was supposed to cover our everything, from call cards, to biscuit money, to flexing money, to personal shopping money, but excluding lunch money for 1 Month oh!!!! Talk about training.. Back then, one of the most Popular sayings in our House was “You this boy (usually me), do you think I pluck money from a tree” because trust me, before 10th of every month, the ego e haf finish. However, my Dad once gave me a gift. It was an Empty Perfume case. According to him yeah, It was supposed to be my Bank account, and my investment. Back then dad would say:


Dad: save now, and spend later.

And In my mind I would reply

Me: On top of this  1 Million naira you gave us ba?


Well I was then too young to understand the value of money, but out of fear of one day being asked how much I had saved in all, I painfully gathered my 10, 20 and 5 naira’s savings into that Perfume case. Gradually, I started to enjoy it, and began hoping for the day I saved my 1st N 1,000, Yes MY OWN!. I remember vividly the day I did, I walked up to dad with a spring in my every step, my Mr Nigeria smile, holding my many many 5 nairas like I was an Agbero at a park and showed it to him. My! was he proud, and he said That’s how I started. One day, you will know the value of this... Dad was right.



"if she gets Pregnant, you will marry her, infact if she does, you are Finished…" yep.. Women


Having that I am the second to the last child of my family, I am in some light categorized as the last born. Any time my elder ones had these serious issue involving Women or men back then, my Dad would begin his conference (Trust me, that man can talk for 2 hours straight) by saying to me, Go to your room… Sadly, once I struck 15, I became eligible to attend these conferences, as me sef had started to bring back negative feedback from my Amebo teachers in the school that your son is a truant :P. Those people shaaa… Dad always said “Junior if she gets Pregnant, you will marry her”… Now these wasn’t an easy pill to swallow, as then this was enough a warning to make me celibate for life. The fear of Pampers and Cerelac  was real oh! He would clearly indicate that you would be On Ya Own, no more 1,000 Naira, but plenty of pampers to buy. I always thought to myself, the 1,000 Naira doesn’t serve me sef, will it then serve a family. Luckily, i smartly survived till now ;)


HOW MANY HEADS DO THEY HAVE?
Association, Responsibilities and Big Dreams


As a child, I always looked at my Dad with so much respect, high expectations, and Fear. I mean we were not allowed to increase the volume of the T.V set beyond 25, or else our own e haf do, nobody was to come visit us(except the person comes first in class all the time oh, that was a free Visa in) , or else the person would face EFCC, FBI, and Police investigation starting from Who is your father, and where do you stay? And ending with what is your mission here. But Dad always made me understand that we decided our fate. He had sent us to the University (Yep, I entered Uni at 16) and soon it would be our time to come out, get a good paying job, get married and take care of our own families. Dad always told us that those who succeeded had a single head, so why couldn't we. Dad thought us that if the big shots like Emeagwali could do it, then we could too. Dad thought me to dream big, but start small. Dad was right...



As I slowly drifted back to reality on that long Saturday drive in our Duru’s Limousine (he can praise that car ehn, **In Dads Voice... "You see this car ehn, you can never see it to buy anywhere, and I am like before?) I looked at the once solid hands that gave me series of slaps, and was amazed at how frail they had become, looked at how the once black hairs had grown grey, looked at the man who was once as strong as stone, as Life had softened him to not only be my Father, but now my one and only Son, and I thought to myself.. Truly Dad was right all along, I was too young to understand, too little to know. But now, I am old enough to understand, but still know too little.



As I end this post this morning, I implore you to take a second and think back on your growing up years, think about what you were taught and told, and confirm if they were right or wrong. I can bet the little money I am worth that they were right. I implore you look at your parents, and just let them know you are grateful for all they taught you. Cause sadly, most of us never really understand the value of Parents in our lives. Sadly, most of us forget that as we grow older and become more beautiful, handsome and richer; they in turn become more feeble, and frail with each passing day. That as we chase Money, fame, women, marriages, and financial freedom, they chase only one thing: FULFILLMENT, constantly praying to GOD that we turn out right, and hoping they did a good job in raising us. We fail to realize that they are growing older daily, and quietly slipping from our hands, we fail to realize that we can never really pay them for all they taught us, but we can let them understand that we value their every step. I implore that you tell them we love them, or say a "Thank you" at least, cause these are words that although they (especially my dad, that man can form hard man) claim they don’t need to hear, but yet they go to bed Praying every night that you appreciate them, and that you don't forget them. 





Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time, you do us a great honor with every single second you sacrifice on this Blog. My prayer this day is that Soon, when it’s your time, your children will not call you Uncle or Aunty, and that you will be a better parent, never forgetting what Dad(Mum) thought you.

P.S: I have a burning anger for my Mother, and i just hope reading this post at COB will help me forgive her. I beg that if you feel the same way towards any of your parents, that you let it go, and just let them know you love them. Please just let it go. Pick up the phone and call them.



P.S: On a lighter note, Turn Up Turn Up people... A very Happy Birthday to a very interesting, plus Beautiful, plus funny  Young and Confused reader. We are humbled to have her here, and I am thrilled with that fact. I can tell from all her comments that she is a happy kinda person, plus mehnn she fineee.. **In the voice of Wild child. I pray that as you grow older today Eve, everything your heart longs for shall be tabled on a tray for you this day. Do have a wonderful celebration. Don’t worry, I am coming to set you up on Tibs Blog ASAP, so watch ya back Madam **winks. May I add that what I love most about EVEy-koko is her name EVE. It wants you to just know more about her. :P






Do have a ghen-ghen week ahead.


Cheers, and make that call to your Parents oh! Just tell them you love them you know, Tell them thank you.



#Udo.

32 comments:

  1. Reading this just took me back to memory lane when all I got was trashing *angry* my dad never trashed me because am the only girl but my mum flogged the living daylight out of me.
    I was very stubborn as a kid, you know this kind of child that you should take to motherless homes, I was that child so anytime I did something, my mum will be like your children will do it back for you, blah blah blah but she reversed it the day I turned 21 and she said she was sorry for being hard on me but oh well, I've become hardened now *shrugs*
    I didn't like cooking as a kid, and my mum will be like the way to a man's heart is his tummy, well, when I was in the University, I stayed off campus and I learnt how to cook and am a bad ass cook now.
    My dad never talked about savings but my mum was like save for the rainy day and as the igbo woman she is, she never gave me unnecessary money but somehow I learnt how to save and the last two phones I used, I got them with money I saved.
    Nonso I liked boys while growing, I mean the thrill of hearing them ask me out and me telling them I'll think about it was unexplainable and I always sneaked out at night to go and block them and I never failed to get trashed but I'll still go. Sheybi na man I go still follow? My mum never failed to lecture me on the if you get pregnant talks, Thank God I went to university and I graduated and here I am.
    Oh well, because my parents gave me their best, I owe them that one obligation and God help me fulfill it.

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    1. Hahhahahahahah @that kind of child you should take to Motherless homes. Lmao.. Amaka oh hehehehe I laughed so hard as I read this comment Bubba. You are hillarious aswear.

      I thank GOD you can relate to this post, and as you ended: We have an obligation to our peeps, I pray we dont fail them. Thank you for visiting Amaka, you know you are my Baby Okwu of life na, you know, My very own Up NEPA commenter. When I see your notifications, I wear my Mr. Nigeria smile.

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  2. True Duru....our parents are treasures we can't buy with money. Thanks Luv

    Happy birthday EVE wishing u a fabulous day hun.

    check out my new post on my blog.

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    1. Thanks Temmie my Angel, truly yeah, our Parents are priceless treasure... I am glad you can relate to this post Bubba, plus Thanks for that wonderful revelation on your Blog. I laughed like a mad man at all your idiosyncratic expressions.. heheheheheh (I just learnt that English, so Ihad to test it **winks)

      THANK you so much for being in my life Temmie, if you leave me, na die oh... **winks.

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    2. Hahahaha. You always make mW laugh and blush. Thanks dearie

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  3. Awwwwww!! John, something is happening on this blog oh! Wonderful wonderful..
    May God give us the grace to love our parents and show them unreservedly that we do!
    PS forgive your mother oh! And write a post about her too! :-) xx

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    1. Yipppeeee... 1+The One, thank you sssssoooooo much Baby mi, You have been a major source of strength, as your comments constantly give me 1 more reason to not stop writing. Thank you for your kind support, IOU big time. And AMEN to your prayer Bubba, thanks.

      About the blog #ItcanOnlybeGOD.

      About my Mama, someday Bubba I will, someday. She dug a hole that no woman has been able to fill, the pain is just too much, but oh well... Thank you once again 1+The One, please dont leave me oh, cause if you do, I will cry you a river naija till I drag you back... dont test me oh, me na Romeo... **winks

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  4. Awwwwwwwwwn! Duru my crush! Me love u so much ok. Thank u for everything...thank u!!!

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    1. Hehehehehe you this Brain geh... **winks, see as you use scope to dodge my question on Tibs blog, diarisgodoooooo Eve. Hbd once again Baby mi, hope you had a great one. We want picshur oh...

      Thanks for being so wonderful, and full of life on the YnC blog, please dont leave us oh, or else, your kidnap is sure. **winks....

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  5. Mehnnnn...I dunno what to say...do you know I had to read this post twice in school, then I came back home and read it again - Duru I can relate to this....buh mehn...that chapter of my life is over....I loved my parents when I could...I mean I tried so very hard...I loved them with every last blood in my veins buh mehn...there came a time I needed to take a step back....I needed to see them as humans NOT as family and I realised that moment - naaahh...this is the end of the road for me with this guys....we need to go our separate ways....I will be honest with you...I miss them and I wish they could see me today wherever they are....buh somewhere in my heart a bell reminds me that - that is a risk I am not willing to take....for people who have their parents in their lives mehn....I hope they cherish them buh for me...I am not ready to be cherished by them or ever cherish them...I mean I am at that point in my life where if I got a call and their lives depended on me saying Yes- mehn I am certain I will say a BIG NO....it is what it is for me tho....Nice post papi.....**I see you**

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    1. Hmmmnnn. All I can say Tibs, is that I am learning to adore and learn from you more and more every day. Reading the post on TTT made me understand better. You are a wonderful human being Tibs, GOD bless the day I met you. XX

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  6. Nice post! Took me down memory lane. You even got spending money sef, in my own case we only got transport fare to school and twenty naira lunch money. Well now I know that I do without most things people my age consider essential. Growing up I thought my mother hated me, we were always at each other's throats. Now I realize its because we were so alike- stubborn and quick tempered. My dad was my angel even though I thought he had aka gum tendencies ;-). I watched The Lion King for the first time in June bawled like a baby when Mufasa died. Parents are precious no matter how hard it is to get along with them

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    1. Hehehehehehehheh @20Naira lunch money... mehn thats scary oh, I think our cases were slightly similar. Mehn Ada, how did we even survive those days sef??? Hahahaha @Aka gum tendencies... **looks around to see if your Dad is in sight. Hehehehe diarisgodoooo Ada. Lmao

      What???? Lion King came out 20 years ago nah?? And you just watched it??? Nawa oh, see what too much Pharmacy books have caused. **winks, no time to flex. :)

      Thank you so much for being here for me Otunne, you are the best.... I would have said will you marry me, but I dont want Oga at the top to vex, so hmmn hmmnn **clears throat thats all. :)

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    2. Maybe I should have added that school closed by 2pm and when I got home at 2:30 there'd be food waiting at home, the twenty naira was more of snack money.
      I don't know how the lion king thing happened o, I watched the part 2 long ago, I just realised this year that I haven't even watched part 1.
      You're such a charming young man nwannem, God bless you for being you.

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  7. This is kinda emotional! While you still have your parents cherish and love them. My dad was strict to a fault and you need to hear his principles. Even in his imperfections he said some great words that melts my heart whenever I remember...that man believed in me.
    Lemme stop here biko
    www.tosyne101.wordpress.com

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    1. Awwgghh Agbani, truly now I am not suprised as to why you turned out to be such a wonderful woman, your Dad must have been a super great father. You and I need to have lunch oh, you know, discuss blogging things. **winks

      Thanks for stopping by Bubba, my am I glad you could relate to this post. I totally agree with what you said, we should cherish our parents all time, every time, cause they will not last forever. XX I am going to your Blog ASAP bubba. **winks

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  8. Parents are always right because they have a wealth experience. When I was much younger I would always ask my father for pocket money and he would reply, saying 'Yours Truly, do you think I pick money from trees'. But, it was only when I started working that I understood the value of money - I work hard for every penny and that's why I value money. Dad and mum also gave me lots of advice which have been very useful. Btw, happy birthday Eve and thanks so very much for this interesting post!

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    1. Yeesssss Bosss... you need to see how I am smiling my Mr. NIGERIA smile cause of your comment oh Y.T. Thanks for stopping by Baby mi, and my am I glad you Could relate to This post. Truly, the wealth of experience which our parents accrued over their growing up years, makes them right most of the time.

      I see I am not alone on the ""Do you think I pluck money on the tree line" **shines teeth. luckily, it has made us know the true value of the term.... there is dignity and pain in Labor.

      Thanks for stopping by the YnC blog Yours Truly, I use Mtn take beg you oh, please dont leave us eh, or else I will go on an unlimited hunger strike till you return. **winks. I dont want no run away lofer... **winks

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    2. Yes o, there is dignity and pain in labour. You are welcome, Duru the great blogger, and there's no way i'm running away, lol

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  9. Your posts amuse me and put smile on my face--golden days dem ends while growing up and dad looks at you like 'Now Check' Now that I am a grown up there things I look at through dadz eyes and I am like s/he is reallly a little chap who just needs to grow up a litttle
    ririzmusings.blogspot.com

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    1. Yaaaaayyyy My Baby Okwu Ritah of life is in thhe building... **Gives standing ovation :). Yess Bubba, truly growing up changes everything. :)

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  10. Hello Gentleman i tagged you in a fun post on my BLOG
    Pls check it out:)

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    1. Lady Beautiful Eagle... **winks. Thanks Bubba, I planed to send you a mail today, but went through mega streessss today, hopefully ma lady, Tommorrow i will send you my growing up lof letter. **smiles

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  11. **clears throat**..Erhmm Sir....the people are demanding for a new post!....hehe....hows you papi...

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  12. Just found your blog.. where have I been all this while?
    My dad hardly touched me as a kid. I was the last born and best student throughout primary school so it was a plus for me. The only time he beat me was when I ate in a neighbour's house but my mum... eh... that woman trained me with slaps. I'm from a family of just girls and whenever my room is A BIT (notice I said a bit because it can never go more than a bit) untidy, there's fire on the mountain or let me just forget to wash my plate, wahala don land. Looking back now, I'm 100% grateful. People think I have an OCD buh I'll be like "you can't understand". Now, she's so gentle and doesn't even shout anymore. I still find it hard to forgive her when she offends me but I'm learning. This post spoke more to me.

    www.buzzedbybeauty.blogspot.com

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    1. Ehennnn Your Dad hardly touched you??? Mehn you were lucky oh! I was all of NOT what you were lol, asin my wahala knew no Limits, and book... hmmmnn for where? heheheheheh @ Your mum ""that woman trained me with slaps"" That line had me in stitches... lwkmdoo

      Truly all we can be is grateful. When I was young yeah, i thought my Dad hated me eh, but now, when I look back... Just like you ehn, all I can be is grateful... Thank GOD for them oh!

      Thank you for this, this reply is a tad belated, but my am I glad to read your comment, and i Thank GOD that you could relate to this.... :) Cheers.

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  13. ....memory lane, nothing like it.

    I had a burning anger for my dad for a very looooong time but God helped me overcome and forgive and boy! I'm much lighter and happier now. I hope one day, this will be your testimony.

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    1. Hmmmnn Amen Peace, Amen... Thanks baby mi. xx

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  14. One word!
    Waoh!
    Ok ders gonna be more than one word.lol.
    This post really spoke to me in ways you can't begin to imagine.
    I am gonna reread it ,and then go back to read all or most of your other posts.

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    1. heheheheheheheh You are a real Funny child oh, hope you know? I thank GOD you could relate to this. Thanks for stopping by. :)

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