Friday, 11 July 2014

I met a Girl... :)



Good morning Great Young mind, from the Bottom of my heart I say TGIF Baby... :p This is a quickie kinda post, so I beg that you please pardon my Cntrl C and Cntrl V lifestyle of today :(.. I just read this on a Colleagues wall on  Facebook yeah, and inasmuch as I hate to do the copy and Paste thingy, It touched my heart, so I thought to share it with you great people... I mean, you guys are the center of my life now after my Family so....

******MARRIED OR NOT, YOU SHOULD READ THIS ...*****

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. If you are not in a relationship now, remember this for the second (or third) time around. It's never too late.

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.


******** The End


P.S: Of recent, I have been chasing money and success like a fool, guess its cause of all the many many heart aches and Rejection falling in love has brought. You see if they paid me a dollar for every NO I have received in this my 22 years and 8 months yeah, I would be stinkingly rich by now.. But issorait. Truth be told, I have given up on love Jari.... Its Too complicated. "My Bottle and my small money should serve" I always said to myself, But this post had me thinking otherwise.... It made me realize that I will NOT live forever, and that no matter how much money I try to accrue, if i don't find a dope ass girl to be with at the end, I might never really be happy.  

P.P.S AKA Testimony time: I met ANOTHER girl AGAIN, and I think i like her, but... :)

P.P.P.S:  I can bet my life that Temmie of Exclusive things Blog will be elated at seeing this post. :) That girl likes love ehn... Well I guess thats why she has such a seemingly lovely heart, and Blog. ;)

P.P.P.P.S: @ Cee I caught feelings, you won. :)

Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time, you do us a great honor with it. Cheers.


#Udo

15 comments:

  1. Awww... You like somebody! hehe
    I never get tired of reading the story above - it always gives something to think about..
    Nothing can substitute love Udo, not money, fame, power or even sex :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow!!!! 1+The One, my am I glad to have you here again :) :) :). You ehn, you are a very interesting person. Issorait. If you read my last post yeah, you will realise that you and Tomi don turn me into acting Born again finish. ;)

      I guess you are right, money, fame, power nor even SEX Can substitute real and genuine love. Thanks for stopping by, please dont leave me and go again oh.... **crying in French... I dont want no Run away lofer...

      Thanks Bubba, cheers.

      Delete
  2. Awwww this is so painful.... Mehnnn... I can't even imagine how much pain the woman was going through....oh lord! Mehn! This broke me in a way... **sigh** buh I'm happy you met someone... I think no matter how 'tiny' the likeness you have for her is... It's worth another step... Happy for you papi....at least you posted something.... Hehe.... Nice one papi...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Tibs, the post shattered my Pride in pieces, and had me thinking.. Hmmmnnn yes oh.. I met her, **wears my Mr. Nigeria smile. I intend to make her a blogger too, so she can come hype me on her blog like Ernie hypes her husband oh. Heheheheh **winks

      Yes oh Ernie, to GOD BE ALL THE GLORY, all your knocking was not in vain, an additional post came out. Buf Ernie it is not easy now, you know you are the Martins +Obama+Mandela of blogsville, so its hard to match up with you nah... but in the words of Churchill, I will never give in... thanks Bubba for the push... I hope from you i will learn to fly.

      Yes oh, I met her, and she likes me I think. Slow and steady sha. Cheers. xx

      Delete
  3. Each time I read this story it brings tears to my eyes. Am actually fighting not to cry on my desk now.
    Love love love, hmmmmmmm I don't want to go there. You caught feelings so you owe me lunch yeah? *Waiting for temmy*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bia, see me thinking this story was new oh... **wears my stupid face I was jumping up and down and forming Colombus that discovered America. Lmao. So its old yeah Amaka? Wow, no wonder you are so inspiration filled, you read vast. Ah abeg dont cry oh, if you cry ehn, na weep I go weep. :( **cleans eyes with Gala nylon.

      Love is just a really important and confusing feeling, but this story has taught me not to give up on love, no matter what.

      About the catching feelings deal, haba we did not conclude nah, eheeeennnn you want to use igbo sense for me ba? Issorait.

      Delete
  4. Awww the story is so sad. Sometimes we never really cherish what we have until we loose it. Hehehe @ temmie is gonna love this post you got it right! *big smiles* ehen...oya oyan me story *winks* who is that lucky Miss Duru

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Bubba, it is... **cleans eyes with serviette, and blows nose... but on a serious note yeah, it had me thinking, life would be worthless and empty without love. Love is like the sun, around which other emotions rotate. Love is tbe greatest.

      **hmn hmnnn **Clears throat... she asked I put up her name to comfirm I was refering to her, but nahhhh make I no go over love ;)... lets just call her T.S. she is just amazing. :) I hope I dont get hurt as ussual :(. Thanks Temmie, as it is you who first reminded me about the true essence of love via Exclusivetins.blogspot.com . Cheers Bubba.

      Delete
    2. Awww *dancing. I am so happy I made you realise that again, that love really matters in life. No matter how much we have being hurt we still need that 1 special person, a perfect arms to hold and a heart that truly cares...

      Wish u so much happiness with her hun *hugs...

      Delete
  5. So touching.. We all need some love every now and then. When will side chicks start to realize how hard it is for a man to leave his family.
    www.tosyne101.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes Bubba, love is truly an Emotion that no man can overlook. Sadly tnough, No matter how much we are hurt yeah, we just have to get back up and love again....

    Yaaayyy!!!! Thank you so much for stopping by on the YnC blog Tosyn, we are most definitely gonna stalk ya blog In return. Cheers Baby mi. Thank you for your time. :) :) :) about the side chicks own ***clears rhroat... a man has got to be a man now, you know a man gas gotta do what a man gas gotra do.... **winks... **flees away...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Knock Knock ----**deep sigh**....(consoles myself)..I'm sure he is having fun.....anyway I thought of telling him he had been nominated for the Liebster Award...Wish he would post something today tho...*sigh*...**signals to hubby** Let's go..I'll see him on monday... :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heheheeheheheh Tibs oh, you never, ever fail to make smile sha... Well I was enjoying my self till 4 hours 32 minutes and some seconds again. T.S is ill, and i cant reach her. I have been so scattered ehhhnnn... Her absence is making me feel like a man in a stray jacket alone in a 6 feet below room. I miss her ehn... But i have been forming Gangster, you know hard man, so i wont let her know i miss her too much. ;) this lof thing shaaaa... I am getting tired already oh.... :)

      Moving on... Wow!!! I got nominated??? "*faints, **wakes up **and Faints again. You guys are the best oh... You need to see me feeling like Chiwetel of Half of a yellow sun. Thanks for the nomination dear, i will check it out ASAP... But Ernie how do you do it??? How do you stay so consistent? Kai in Martin Luther kings voice **I have a dream, that one day, i will be as great and awesome a blogger as Tibs....

      Delete
    2. Aww...hey!...I am looking forward to a new post tomorrow...yay!..

      Delete
  8. Hmmmm...never knew u had a blog too. Nice post sir. Have a great day.

    ReplyDelete