Monday, 4 August 2014

SPOKEN WORDS







Good morning great Young mind, how was your weekend? Hope it turned up wella for you and yours eh? Hope you had madt fun? Mehn its Monday again oh, and from the bottom of my heart, all I can say is Mttcheeewww. :( I mean this life is somehow, by this time last week I was lounging, and now it’s a coffee affair to stay awake :(


Well my weekend was super fun oh, I traveled to the Ancient city of Ijebu Ode, Ogun state for a Yoruba Owambe Party on Saturday, and it was mad. As in there was toooooo Much to eat and Drink. **In the voice of I.K of BBA.. Yorubas can Partttie!!… Kai!. I mean Yoruba’s rock. Can you believe that before they said the Opening prayer, they had already shared a plate of ghen-ghen rice and a bottle of malt, asin ALREADY oh. In my mind I was like Today na Today oh! Mehn I was amazed. If you go to an Igbo party yeah, Firstly after waiting 2 Hours from the scheduled commencement time, they will then do the opening Prayer. After the opening Prayer, Nsobu ga Bata (Trouble will enter) as they will now start doing that their Yeye  welcome to high table, then give an Igbo version of Martin Luther King Jnrs Speech as Opening speech by the chairman oh, then break Kolanut (Can you imagine, this is  a reception for heaven sakes where people come to eat and go, who gives a damn about a stupid Kolanut :) ), then they will give another Obama’s Yes I can welcome address by the host etc. At the end of all these Protocols ehn the Host of Angels called Worms in your stomach will be singing for joy, and when they eventually start sharing the food, it goes from The Richest to the poorest, from the Front to the back of the hall. Heheheh So if you are a wedding crasher like I used to be, we would be at the wwwwaaaayyy back Fasting and praying that the food doesn’t finish before it gets to us, or that they will not say Meat has finished. Hehehehe On those days, guymen would some days end up collecting ONLY bottled water, and snap picture on an Empty stomach as if we wrere having fun... kai the pains of Instagram. :( Igbo Kewnu Hia. I mean at the Party of Saturday, they were just serving food everywhere at the same time. I mean you turn left.... Ushers, turn right... more ushers. The catering ushers were were on a roll. The bad thing sha, was there was a man at my table who nearly went home hungry, cause the haphazard sharing was not in his favor. I pitied the guy sha, he was just drinking water. Lmao. We had to call on the ushers to come end his agony. 


So something happened last week that inspired this post, I in my normal playful nature pissed off a very Beautiful girl, and by JdB’s book of Woman chasing, it is a sin to make a Fine girl angry at you for too long. So you needed to see me apologizing to this Beautiful Babe of life like she was my wife. Kai… me and woman sha… So it had me thinking, and inspired this. So… SPOKEN WORDS.. 


Speaking is one of the easiest things to do when one is hurt, it’s pretty easy to open up our lips and cuss, swear, rant, and pour out all the pain that lies in our hearts. Its even really easy for us to crack a joke at the expense of making another feel really bad and hurt. Sometimes this happens mistakenly, as we say things we do not mean, while at other times, its very intentional, as we say certain things out of Anger, and sometimes out of pain. Life is teaching me that one of the hardest things to correct is not an image created based on Action, but an image created based on words spoken, cause people might forget what we did for/to them, they will surely forget what you said to them, but they will NEVER EVER forget how you made them feel. So it’s really a matter of feelings, as this seem to stick to the hearts of humans for a long time. 


When I was a kid, 8-10 to be precise, I was this kinda crazy “oh GOD what kind of a child is this” child you know the kind that says to my Mother “”I will tell my Daddy for you”” like if she wasn’t his wife heheh, and the kind that if I got really upset by something my Parents did to me, I would scatter the entire living room in defiance. Mehn I was bad, I would put the flowers under the cushion, bring down all the pictures, take off all the detachable cushions and throw everywhere, tear the calender into shreds, turn over the center table but I never touched the Televison oh, cause I never ever forgot how I was whipped when I damaged the television the last time, you see my craze had a little rationality.. kai I was bad.  But one of the things I know I did the most when I was angry was say Hurtful things to my Mum, siblings and Elders. I would point at my Elders and say how much I hated them, tell them they were wicked, heartless, and how I wanted them out of my life. I so cannot count how many Nuclear Family meetings they called on my head. it was on one of those counseling days, an Elderly woman once said to me: 


“Nonso, Spoken words are like Eggs, once an Egg falls to the ground and breaks, it can never ever be put back together, and so it is with words. When a word is spoken, it can NEVER be called back forget all those I take it back that Onyibo used to talk. When you hurt someone with your words, its like a needle that pierces deep into the heart of the recipient.””


Life through my eyes is an inbalance, but I am learning that it is better to heal with our words than to hurt, better to SHUT-UP when we are angry and go take a lot of Alcohol, or sleep, than to open up our lips to vent out. Cause just like the Elderly woman above said, once a word is proclaimed, it sticks to the heart of the recipient for life.


P.S: Kindly permit me to tell you something you already know, your words can Heal or kill, create or Destroy, mend or bend, so I implore…. NO! I beg you to Think before you talk, I beg that just before you insult that Crazy guy that stepped on your shoes, or the drunk that overtook you like a moron on the road, that you imagine that these people probably have problems in their lives, so correct them nicely and smile, cause who knows you might have just healed them. And when you really hurt someone unconsciously, i beg that you do well to say I am sorry.


P.P.S: As the very confrontational person I am, I advice that you actually go ahead to Tongue lash those who deserve it oh, some people are just mumu by nature. :p


Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time, you do us a great honor with it. My prayer for you is that in this month of August, you shall have cause to throw a Yoruba Owambe party that has small chops, Big meats the size of my fist, Small rice with plenty Salad (as in the quantity of the salad is some times more than the rice), I just hope you will have a cause to celebrate soon, but please don’t fail to send me an Invite, cause if you don’t, and I hear About the party, mehnnnn Your Kidnap is sure. 


Cheers People, and do have a ghen ghen week ahead.


#Udo.

16 comments:

  1. The truth is hard to swallow.....my weekend was really bitter cause i was angry and talked too much.. i feel terrible cause i know i've lost something.
    but i will do better, stop getting angry and go silent if i ever get angry...
    Have a ghen ghen week too:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwwgggh Bubba What happened? I hope you are better now? Don't worry about what you think you lost, the thing about life is that: whatever we lose wasn't just meant to be ours. Truly words can cost us much. :)

      Delete
  2. Hmmmmn, I love this post and I agree with u. We shouldn't joke with everything cos we don't know how that same stuff hurts other people. Nice post great man. Have a lovely week.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehehe Before nko Evey-koko, why wont you love the post... **Winks. True talk Baby mi, the things we say might affect others in ways we never planned. Thanks for stopping b y, and my am I glad you are back.. :)

      Delete
  3. **sigh** I wish papi... that I have attended one of these African parties.....mehn...the parties we throw in our country can make you run into debts faster than you can breathe......do you know that, it is actually when the party is going on that people go begging guests for extra money to buy drinks....**covers face** they have no shame...(like me....buh I got shame mehn when it comes to that)...hehe....you know, some years back....my tongue could bring down the china wall.....yup....it was bad papi.....You do NOT want to get on my bad side cuz I would tell you something and you may need to go home and give your father a beatdown for conceiving you.......buh papi...truly words are eggs.....I can't tell you how many dramas my husband had to go sort out cuz his wife wouldn't shut it....now it's a case of you say it - you handle it......**sigh**...I had to learn papi.....Nice work....Thank you for this.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heheheheheh for real? During the parties? mehn Naija folks always have their parties all planned out oh, sometimes i wonder how people survive financially after throwing such gigs, and I am like BLOOD MONEY ALERT!!

      hahahahah @ Beat down for conceiving you.. lmao Tibs you will not kill somebody with laugh shaaa... Thank you Ernie, I am glad you could relate to this. A spoken word is truly the hardest thing to correct. Cheers.

      Delete
  4. You are so true on the ibo owanbes...not trying to be tribalistic but yorubas throw the most exciting owanbes. As a matter of fact,I do not like going to an owanbe hosted by ibos cos its always the same thing. The speech, the drama...all these I can't deal mehn and the food surely won't be enough. It has never and I doubt it ever will..anyways I always try to watch what I say because I've seen situations where just spoken words destroyed relationships and even family. So I try to watch what I say and I only say things I can back up before someone says moby said I said they said...

    www.mylifeasmoby.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True that Bubba, Yorubas most definitely throw better parties oh, me sef don see am with my 2 koro koro eyes. hehehehehe @food is never enough, that part just makes me sad, its either that Food has finished, or Meat has finished, and I am like smh for the hosts oh! Why party if you dont have?

      True talk Baby mi, the words we say have huge ability to destroy things, and once they are destroyed, it is often hard to repair the damage. :( Thanks for stopping by Mobi, i appreciate the support Bubba, **In Mobys voice Oya chop kiss... :)

      Delete
  5. No pictures of the party??
    I am very temperamental and when my craze start, nobody can stand me but thankfully am learning to control my tongue. Man my tongue is very caustic, I mean like tibs, if I insult you, you'll ask God why you were not flushed down the drain at two weeks.
    Now before I talk though I use my tongue to count my teeth.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehehehe Amaka never fails to crack me up shaaaa! bia Nwanyi, do i look like Camera man in ya eyes. heheh I didnt take much pictures though, but Instagram is the way on this one! **Winks

      heheheheheh @ Why you were not flushed down the drain. Laff e haf kill me hia! lwkmd. True that Bubba, the words we say have effects on the recipient that can last a life time :( Thanks for this Bubba, i am glad you could relate to it.

      Delete
  6. I tell you I don't even joke with words no more. People of this world will use your word against, and most times I spill its always a joke. Lol but when I am serious I spill my words like venom I just can't wait to let it out I dnt 'look oju uche'. This days I hardly talk cos them don gimme name wey no dy my certificate. Lol about the owambe we bad like that, I was at Ogun state over the weekend for owambe too. Mehn their road bad not like MJ's o. I have been to an igbo owambe and I enjoyed it o, we ate well of course. I have never been to a party and I won't eat, they gotta be joking and I don't rush sev.
    I did a post on male and female work outfit you might want to check it www.tosyne101.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehehehe No be small people of this world oh! Agbani you ehnn lmao... True thing sha is that some people deserve to be put in their place, I went to the bank yesterday, and one yeye lady was trying to form I came to steal, and my account (cause of the signature) wasnt mine. I shouted on her ehnnn. lmao.

      Ehhhheeennn are you sure it wasn't the same party we attended? I saw one babe that was fine like you eh! lmao.. heheheheh

      At the Igbo Party, You get luck be that oh! an average Igbo party will always run out of meat, but oh welll, we have RICH igbo people that can kill Annaconda to celebrate, so the meat will never finish. Thanks for stopping by Baby mi, its always fun to see, (abi READ) you around. :) cheers

      Delete
  7. Aww, you were bad oo. True, we should always think what we want to say through before blurting anything out. Fortunately I'm one of those who think more than they say and being subtle is one of the things I learned from an early age (boarding school tinz) When I'm angry all I see is red so I rarely ever blurt out hurtful things. It's later I begin to think of all things I should have said that I didn't :). Anyway, beg that girl very well o
    www.ironyoflhurve.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heheheheheheh No be small Beg that girl very well oh! Trust me Bubba, i did, and the soothing thing is that she commented on this post, so I guess I am forgiven... **Winks.

      Mehn Baby mi, subtle is everything I am not oh! from a tender age, i wasn't bad, i have been terrible, and my Anger is like Hades flames :(. But oh well, I guess i could learn a little subtility from you **Winks, cause that will most definitely help balance my life :)

      Thanks for stopping by Lhurve, it is always a pleasure to see another beautiful smart Babe of life around, what more can I say... I think I am in lof with Lhurve.... :) Cheers.

      Delete
  8. I have to be boiling mad to say mean things! i have had a taste of my words and it was really awful. i always end up apologizing for what i said even though the person was wrong. Its not just worth it!

    i do more of sarcastic response now! and in rare cases i still bite!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True that Baby mi, i for one hate apologizing.. I mean it makes me feel so weird saying I am sorry. So i am learning to shut tha hell up... Thanks for commenting CPC. I am glad to have you back aswear....

      Delete