Good morning great young mind, what’s cracking? What’s Popping? Before I say anything, permit me to say Aiiii Zaaa…. Lmao. Its a new slang I officially stole from…. You guys know where nah!.... The Queen Dope’s Blog :p. And trust me, I have been repping it all time every time ever since. So first of, I will not complain about Monday today, so moving on… As I typed this post yeah, I took a look at my hands, and it seems they have become fairer or something! Yep!! Fairer. I mean the sanitation is bloody real, at this rate ehn, my hands will soon become see through oh, as I have been washing my hands with anything that forms lather oh
Ebola)! Ranging from Toilet Soaps eh, to Antiseptic soap oh, to Ariel, to Jik, to Hypo, I mean
anything. As long as it is slimy and can wash hand, mehn I have adopted it! I
mean No body wants to die nah, so we be washing hands like it be going outta
fashion, thanks to Ebola wahala. Oya **in the words of Moby.. Chop Kiss and let
me give you small Amebo.
Last week was bloody scary for me, shout out to Evey Koko for checking on me eh. Remember I told you guys that I used to do over 250 Press ups, and sit ups in search of the body of a god? Well all I still have is the lekpa skinny lanky body of a coffee drinker :( I mean NO muscles, No Biceps talk less of triceps, and yeah NO!!!! 6 packs. What I however have is a pained spine. So mehn last week was pain for me, as my spine ached like I was 70 and had RHEUMANTISM. Also this danged 8-5 was tough the week before as it was 8Am -8Pm, so last week I started to develop a crazyyyy Fever, and then to put insult upon injury and pour sand sand inside my garri, I had a running Stomach, cause I went to one ROAD side canteen to eat and was forming gangster so I didn’t drink water afterwards.. So Bam! all in all, I had a Hurting spine, a growing Fever, and I was constipated. Mehn you needed to see me, I was under self isolation. Mehn I feared I had caught the Ebola Fever oh, so mehn my room was my solace. I had even started writing my will in my head, you know who would take my shoe, my phone, and my Laptop, and started brooding about how I wouldn’t chop all the money I have been mumuishly saving for the past 18 months. Mehn it was scary like that oh, but thank GOD for GOD oh, and for my Dockitar of life, she just eased my fear by telling me I was fine, as i didn't have the major ghen-ghen symptoms... And you needed to see how effective immediate my health bettered. You see ehn, Fear is a crazy thing oh, it can ill and Kill some one. Once I put a call to my sister
(yep I see her for only 3 hours a day), and she said what she
said, I got well ASAP. And I am like Damn! But you know how I knew that I wasn’t
ill, mehn I was still eating like a lion oh. All those one that they were
saying Loss of appetite! Taa!!! for where? In the words of Cee.. **Yimu. Cause me ehn, I had
breakfast by 7 am or something all through, so mehn Ebola?? Naaahhhh #PastorJdBmode
The weekend was a very eventful one, as it had me in-between moods. You know I hit a target, did some Labour Job, and then I had time to think. So this morning please permit me to tell you something you already know, Permit me to inform you that YOUR PROBLEM IS YOU. When I was Younger, I think 14 or so, I was chilling in the kitchen with my Mum (are youconfused.com? :)) and we were just gisting. She then brought out a bulb of Onion and showed it to me, think she brought like 3 sev and said,
“Junior humans are like Onions, there is no perfect one. And Just as every onion has a scar, is rotten, torn, or has a faulty inside, so are humans””.
We all have our issues, our Achilles heels, our personal problems, but the thing is that many of us fail to acknowledge that there is really an issue. We constantly limit ourselves and our lives with our Emotions, our fears, our limitations, our Achilles heel, and our self doubt. We constantly create boundaries in our minds, and justify the reasons why we cannot succeed, or be the best that we can be, by validating our inabilities. We let “BUTS” determine our status in life, and we frequently compare, and measure our success with that of another.
The truth is, growing up through my eyes is bloody difficult, as I often feel I am transitioning from a boy to a man at too fast a pace, but Life is teaching me that we all have OUR own destinies, OUR own goals, and OUR own targets, so trying to live up to the standard of another is only going to make us never satisfied with where we are. Many of us constantly pray to GOD to give us what others have, we envy others, we strive to be just like them, we study them, we imitate them, but each time we let our emotions lead us towards competition, the same emotions gradually pull us further away from our originality, making us nothing but copies. Yep, our Emotions are our Enemies, but sadly we create our Emotions subconciously. ;,( Erniesha Tibs said something to me yesterday, she said, Do not pray to GOD to give you what you want, but rather pray to him to give you what you need. So today I implore you, NO!! I beg you to be you, Do you, and to better you. Do not spend your life as an image of another, cause that way you will constantly be an impediment to yourself, you will constantly be a Problem to yourself, and you will constantly be your own Adolf Hitler (enemy) fighting a senseless war against your own Jews (Talents).
Please LIVE YOUR DREAMS, be the best YOU that YOU can be, and remember that You will die soon, and you will never live forever. but when you die, what would you want to be played back on your Heavenly plasma screen? A life of imitation and self imposed limitations? or a genuine life? My Beautiful Blog mother Ms Janyl Benyl said something to me yesterday
you my weekend was packed), she said, no man ever becomes successful by
bringing others down, or by striving to outperform another, we succeed ONLY by
lifting others up, by learning about how the successful got successful, by
having the Humility of heart to learn, and by acknowledging our problems and
striving tooth and nail to get better than we were yesterday, and not than
another. Permit me to add that our Emotions are Eruptive. Take for instance Envy. Envy brings bitterness, Bitterness brings hate,
and Hate brings many many more wahalassss. So if you wanna be happy, make another happy,
cause you know this life ehn, You Only Live Once oh!, so when you are gone,
what do you wanna be remembered for? In the words of Tibs Think bout it..
The 14- FOR-14 challenge is almost over oh! And I am already feeling sad, I mean its been an avenue for me to just pour out my thoughts as they are, but oh well: Dear Ms Janyl Benyl, please lets have a 15-FOR 15 Challenge next year :p.
In other news, **wears My Mr. Nigeria smile, a little birdie told me that someone dumped me oh! As in Dumped me! And I am like all the 2014 dumping i have gotten in real life never do ba? I am now also being Electronically, and blogically dumped too :(. Nawa oh? Shey na only me waka come ni?? And I am like Aiiii.. ZZaaa… Me! A whole Mr. Nigeria like moi! **Hits hand on the chest.. **In an Igbo Accent, me Oberaeagu, the son of Barrister Adol 1 of **Scratches head Ehhmmm whats that my village name again?? Adaeze Where are you eh?? any how scratch that... Impossicant! Lmao. So I want to through this medium apologize to Erniesha Tibs for being MIA, I mean we sat down over the weekend and had a serious Family
Planning session meeting lmao (Oga Mofaya, na Play oh! Abeg oh, I can clearly see the No Trespassing
sign sir :)) and so we settled our Wahala.. So Dear Ernie, I am re-proposing to
you through this post to not only reengage me, but to be not just my Friend,
but My Sister and my Liebster. Action Time.. **Puts one Knee on the ground, brings out My
Journal of thoughts and hands it to Ernie.. and in my Upcoming Barritone voice
says…. Do you Erniesha, take this post as a sign of my Sistership and Liebstership, to hold it
when I misbehave, to bitch slap me when I screw up, and to encourage me when I can't
go on **wears Puppy face.
So watcha say?
P.S: I will like to say a huge thank you to everybody that has carried this friendship beyond Blogosphere, I mean you guys inspire me with every chat, call, text et al that we have, and I am learning so much day by day from you all. I mean it inspires me how I started blogging totally in the dark, and I met so many others like me that just plunged into the dark with hopes of learning, and I am like gracias to GOD and you all.. You guys are making me a better person, writer and human being, so if you have done it ( I mean contacted me outside here), I would have said like Amaka that I am batting my eyelashes for you oh, but so Fashola does not misinterpret me for a 14 years sentence candidate, I will just want say in the words of Moby Oya Chop kiss… and let you know that I love and respect you sev** In Tosynes voice :).
P.P.S: Dear Ms Janyl Benyl, you mean the world to me. I wish I knew just how I could pay you back for being such a blessing, for caring, and for having my back all day every day.. Trust me, I have plans for you eh!!! Big ones. **Winks
Shout out to Funmi Reese.., her comments made me smile through the weekend, amma gonna stalk you back ASAP Bubba (Bim Akinmade thought me this term :()
1. I am worried about Bim Akinmade of beingme360.wordpress.com, the babe is one of the bestest, dopest, finest gehs I know, and I miss her so much. I know I was the jerk as ussual, but please if you guys can please go over to her Blog and check on her, and then tell her I miss her, and that and I am sorry for being a jerk, I would be very grateful. :( Yours Truly, I am sure you would like Bim eh, she writes for Bella Naija like you do. :)
2. I am worried about Changing Post codes of changingpostcodes.wordpress.com. I mean this Law babe came to Nigeria for Law school, and she just went dark, I have been writing her, but no show. :( I miss her like mad.
3. Tightens belt, please eh, where is Tomilola Lawal of withtomi.com? if anyone sees Tomi, please tell her I miss her laughter eh ;(, and I miss her smiles very much. And tell her that because of her and 1 + THE ONE yeah, I might soon become Born Again.. I said Might oh :) and i mean it.
Peace ITIMI!!!!!!!!! Where are you? And Cee too?? you people have dumped me too shey? All this Dump that all you gehs are dumping me hia and dia, diarisgodooo.. No be only me waka come eh... **crying in French.
Do have a super fab week, and I pray for you that this week, your Internet subscription will not expire when you are broke. I mean that shit is annoying :( its just 18th and i am out grrrr...
Thanks for the past 7 minutes of your time family, you are why I write, why i smile, and slowly but surely becoming part of why I live.. Cheers, and please no matter what, stay young and stay confused... xx