Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Who is a mother?



Is a mother the one who carries you in her womb? is a mother the one who shields you from pain? is a mother the one who gives you her breast to suckle even on days when she fasts and prays all night? is a mother the one who begged Daddy to not hit you when you broke the glass plates? is a mother the one who reminds you to marry the right woman?! I dont know, but what I know is that a mother isn't just one linked to us by blood, but one linked to us by love.

All my life i have tied the word mother more to hate, pain, fear and grief making it seem like there was really no one, but wasn't there? The truth is there was you ma. You came in and met me and my siblings. A young and Confused boy with pain in his heart and growing confusion in his head. I didn't know you, and heaven knows that for a while i didnt like you. But you loved me regardless. That melted all my stubbornness away, as i grew to love you more and more.

No one believed that I wasn't yours, that you hadn't carried me in your womb for 9 months, that you weren't the one who rocked my cradle from birth. Why? Why didn't they believe? cause you showered me, your Husband, and my siblings with so much joy and love.. I remember when you would give all your salary so we wouldn't go naked... You made me feel loved.  I love you Mrs Duru.

Sometimes i wonder why life is so unfair, why the good go thorough pain, why those who deserve to smile are tortured the more by this Bitch called life.. But then mother, i look at you and realize that you are more of a victor than a warrior, and this makes me work Harder. You are my Why Mrs Duru.

As i write this mother, I am all teary and shit, I fell in love with an Hausa girl... We are willing to battle the society and end up together, she is strong Mummy, just like you, and she loves me to pieces, heheh Just like you. Heaven knows I miss you, and from the bottom of my heart, that I love you. I have had to battle Sex, drugs, peer pressure, Alcoholism, and all by myself. I couldnt talk to Dad, i tried to talk to a couple of people, but they dont really understand.. You know Mum, i used to tell you everything, but this distance is fucking with my mind. 

I promise You Mum, that for all the pain you went through, i will one day make you proud, that for all the nakedness you went through to buy me Pierre Cardin and Next clothes, i will never forget you. Mother someday, I promise you, we will have more than we need.

Happy 47th Birthday Mum... You are why i didn't turn out so wrong, you are my real Mother figure..

19 comments:

  1. Aww, could you send this to her? She needs to read it :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aaaaaaawwwwww! Nice one handsome, hope she gets to see this. Happy birthday to her, wish her Gods favor in all her endavors, and many more healthy years. Bia handsome no dey tell me wen to put up new post inugo? I old pass u.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is sweet :) Happy Birthday to your Mum Bubba..
    getting stronger by the day....xx

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happy birthday to her, like Toin said, send this to her. X

    ReplyDelete
  5. This is really touching and very beautiful. May God bless Mrs Duru and I pray that you and your siblings will make all her sacrifices and efforts for you worthwhile

    ReplyDelete
  6. I wonder why I had to turn to your page on a day like this and the first thing I see is the one thing I've tried not to think about all day. Why Duru? WHY????

    08023005656...I miss calling that number. Even more today when I would have called to wish mother a happy 57th birthday. I miss her today. I've stayed so strong all day. Now memories flood. In two weeks her passing will be exactly a year. I try not to remember the shock and pains and questions and hate and anger and feeling of helplessness.

    For your sake so we all smile and stay sane, I'll remember the day she carried me to the hospital when I couldn't walk because we had been told I needed to have my appendix removed as it would soon rupture. I remeber her holding my weight to reduce the weight off me that i may stay strong. We waited hours at general hospital with no response...it was all we could afford. Still she didn't complain, only cried out for help for her daughter till it came. I remember the days of all the choice delicacies growing up in the hostel. I miss her coconut rice baaaad. I miss my mom. Why you have to make me cry...

    I wish she were here you know. Time to reap all the fruits of her labour.

    Happy Birthday to your ma. God bless her for you all.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Happy birthday Mrs Duru, nice piece!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Happy birthday to Mrs Duru - Wishing her many more years xxxxxx

    Btw, how is our girlfriend, Duru?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Happy Birthday Mum Duru. What a beautiful way to celebrate her. Motherhood I think is another thing given by God. ririzmusing.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wow...this is so amazing. Happy birthday to your mum. You really should send this to her swits. You should

    ReplyDelete
  11. This is the cutest Duru. Happy belated Birthday to your mum. I'm excited because i am also an October Baby. May God bless her and fulfill all her heart desires.

    Love,
    Atinuke.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I wish her a very happy birthday laced with many more years in health and wealth .

    ReplyDelete
  13. Happy birthday to your mum,the piece is really lovely.....am a silent reader but had to comment today its so lovely that ur boo is hausa...am hausa(ok fulani) too and dating an ibo person and we also battling society together.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Your mum is 47? What are you, like 15? Good gawd I'm totally an agadi nwanyi
    I don't have kids yet but I see my sisters kids as mine cos I do love them like they are mine.
    Great writing. U really should let her read this.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This is a touching piece. I hope she sees this and it lightens her day.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Thanks fam. I swear I wasnt sure anybody would read this post, and i wrote it from a weeping heart. But you guys.. You see all of you above? You guys are all wonderful. You have an ever green home in my heart for life. Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Duru... dnt just write it here, tell her you love her.

    ReplyDelete