Turn up Turn up ladies and gentle men, what gwan fam? What’s happening? In Mobys voice Kilon pop?! Mehn I dey vex.. I mean yesterday I went to bed relatively early, more like immediately I got off the phone with Erniesha yeah, I boarded the next flight to lalaland, and then bam, I woke up to that frigging alarm by 3:47 Am, and saw this email from the place of survival saying “Dear Duru, please turn water into wine and send to us at the Abuja office VERY EARLY IN THE MORNING.." I mean comeonnn… these guys ehn. Haba! Because I am forming loyal and doing Vampire that doesn’t want Festac morning sun to catch me in bed doesn’t mean I don’t have a life nah.. **Shrugss.. Anyway, I just got in here, but before I even open my outlook yeah, lemme attend to you guys who are the real MVP’s jari. I would have said you guys mean more than my job to me ehn, but as an Igbo man, money matters, and in the light of you guys refusing to start paying Tithe into my Stanbic account yeah, I have decided to be loyal to my job a little more than to you.. **Wears Tashas mischievous smile.. So how was your weekend fam? If i didnt send you a V.N with me singing in my Ghen ghen voice over the weekend, then expect me like second coming ooo **Shines Teeth. Hope you guys turned up ooo, hope you went partying… that reminds me, tomorrow is my Numero Uno’s birthday, and the birthday of one of the bloggers that I trip for with all my heart.. You see ehn, something about Agbani is that she gets mad at me per second on Watsapp, but I love the fact that she never stays Mad at me.. Agbani I love you to the end of the moon and back, and if not for the kinda muscles that your boyfriend has, plus all the Brother in the lord moves Gbolahan is throwing at us that we dont quite understand ehn **Tongue out, I would have been toasting you by now. Happy Birthday in advance bubba, please have fun oh, and give me details for the parry biko, my blood dey hot and i haven't been with woman in a while.. **Covers face. Please where is Evey Koko o? I miss her baje baje.. So my life has been fuckedup.com since Dr. Duru went for her licensing exam in far away Enugu, and I miss her like kilode **Wears sad face.. In the light of that, and having that me and my big brother both hate to cook and wash plate.
Kai I hate washing plate ehn. I prefer to sweep from here to Badagry than to wash plate walahi Chisos! we have had only
2 options since she left. Option A. Eat swallow outside since its easier to build house than to cook soup, and Option B. Eat Rice and Tin tomato
with maggi and Oil somewhere there in the concoction stew we cook… :( So yesterday I was angered in my spirit and
went to buy Spaghetti to cook.. My people when I got to the store, I bought Cameroon pepper, and 6 cubes of maggi
and Oil and I think that’s all.. We are broke so we didn’t buy meat or
anything, we just had to change diet noni. My people that was how I entered kitchen
oh! And the worst happened.. Now I am a pepper freak, so each time I am cooking Biafra food, i always pour the lot of the 50 Naira worth into the pot, but yesterday i didn't realize that the Cameroon pepper is made in hell fire. Fam na so I pour everything inside oh as the spirit led, and then poured ALL the pepper as usual.
Chisos! When the food was ready ehn, we were looking for fire extinguisher after every gulp.. it was
HORRIBLE. Its official I need a wife. A fine wife that would be teaching me cooking through watsapp. Please apply in person. Thank you.
Before I start to go all lovey dovey on my family, I have to rant at them. Is it me or African.. No screw that... Is it me or NIGERIAN Parents can send message for state? Mehn this Enugu I went to ehnn.. Lemme just say I suffered. Chei! I never hexsperred it aswear. My Dad was just a thorn in my Flesh during the day, and a drinking Partner at night **Shines teeth… First of, I think I need to change my name, as this Junior that they call me is wayyy too easy.. I need a new name, you know all those kinda names that they will forget, and before they remember yeah, they will just kuku decide to do the thing by their self. Maybe Alphonsus.. No they will remember that one, its similar to Adolphus smh, Or Niccodemus or Scholastica. Or something.. Because My father! That man! kai! During the Yuletide ehnn, he will be watching TV down stairs and then I will just enter his head and then bam! Junior!!!! Come and close this curtain! I mean the curtain was just by his shoulder all the while o! or he was like Junior!!! Come and reduce this Television.. Ehm Sir, use the remote nah... lmao.. This one angered me the most: Junior!! Come and answer this call and tell them I am sleeping.. I died after this one.. I mean the day he said that ehn, I was like in my mind, sir just ignore the call already nah!.. I love that Man aswear.. heheh my nigga for long time thats who he is. The day I wore my headset at daytime ehn! Chisos!! See tongue lashing.. lmao! But you know ehn Fam, on the last day of my stay at Enugu, I realized that all these things they do to us are done intentionally, cause they still want to be sure that no matter how much money we made when we grew up, or how successful we would become, they just wanted to be sure that we had their back, and that I would never forget him. They still want to be sure that we remember to not forget them, and that we are their kids no matter what. I mean I know this nah cause dad said it to me indirectly.... But grr… Why didn’t he just paste a "Don’t forget to remember me" notice on the wall nah. Heheheheheh. Oh My Home!
So January 20th this year marks 3 years since we lost the first house which I wrote about in: B+ Hopedies last, so I have this kinda Ambivalent feeling. However, in the light of the fact that I took up the 15 for 15 challenge by Janyl, it seemed right to write on this what comes to my confused mind in relation to that day… You see on January 20 2012, after we lost the house yeah, in my confused eyes life was over, I felt my family had more or less been thrown back miles backward that we would become a public disgrace, I thought I had not just lost my fathers house, but also our HOME, and then going back to school for my Final year then I had this low morale like my world had ended.. In my head life as I knew it was over.. But then GOD has taught me that for a family to thrive, all that is needed is not as much as financial strength as it is Emotional strength.. Cause when I look around now, I find out that indeed we lost a House, but then our Home became stronger as that winchie winchie incidence took away all forms of cracks, and made us all bare in each others eyes.. I vividly remember that all I had left after the fire was a pair of black shoes and the very clothes I wore, and so did Dad and Mr Mamman. My Big bro and Dr. Duru were far away so they were less affected, but us 3, we realized that yes we lost the house but the fact that we had each other still breathing was all we needed to rebuild, to recreate our lives, and to be WEALTHY again. Do I miss the things I had! Hell yeah! do I love the things I have now! HELL YEAH!.
You see life through my eyes is a bloody confusion, but I am learning that Love is all that really matters in a family, cause even at that time when it would rain and we would be drenched, waiting for the sun to come dry us up, I realized that the fact that I had my Dad to tell me that all would be alright was all that I needed to keep hoping. to keep keeping on, and to not loose my head on those bastards that brought us pain. That I had my Family there by my side was all that I needed. In all sincerity, I dunno what many go through in their personal lives, but what I know is that Family is the strongest incorporation there is, but not a family based on hate or selfishness, but a family based and built on true love. So no matter how fucked up our conditions become, in my head ehn, there is only one first place of call to aim to heal at, and thats with your Family.
Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time great Young mind, you guys do us a great Honor. In Barr. Duru’s voice, my prayer for you yeah, is that GOD will give you the energy to have many many many many midnight prayer session with your spouse that will result in plenty plenty plenty kids, and that he will then give you the longevity of life to live and have plenty grey hair, so as you grow older yeah, you can Cross your legs on a table while sipping on Palm wine, and shout to your last born Son! Junior!!! Come and reply this comment on my blog. :) Cheers Fam and do have a ghen ghen week ahead.
P.S: How many of us know Erniesha of www.everydaytibs.blogspot.com? Well a couple of people have asked why all of us adore her, why we love her so much, why we treat her like a queen… Someone even called us Voltrons.. Smh.. People sha... The truth is it is because that’s what she is.. AWESOME… Erniesha is a blessing, she is someone that Loves and loves completely, someone that sacrifices and sacrifices completely, someone that is loyal and that is loyal to the core. She is AWESOME aswear.. that’s the word.. I would have added Amazing.. But SOPHIE is my personification of amazing (Mannie and Ice if you near Sophia ehn, I will kill you both..)**Winks at Ernie.. So Erniesha got nominated for a bloggers award and its going down, Y'all please show her support and vote for her, cause she deserves it, trust me. She really is an Amazingly Awesome lady.
P.P.S: I totally apologize for locking the comments box on yesterdays post, that post was too deep for me, and I just needed to write it and just leave it! I promise you fam that as long as I am a woman Wrapper in this life, it will not happen again. I give you my word. **Wears Mr. Nigeria smile
P.P.P.S: Tomi and Zoe are backkkk… I am uber excited. I love these 2 writers like Kilode. Please show them some love.
P.P.P.P.S: To all the Participants of the 15 for 15 Challenge, lemme just tell you oh! no! lemme warn you... **Draws ears.. Lemme Tell you that I Duru OBEREAGU (Small Lion) Adolphus 1 of that my village that i don't remember the name of... I'm the Defending Champion of the challenge, and I am not gonna let any bory steal my Trophy… **Looks at Clara.. hehehehehehe Turn up Turn Up people, please put up your posts already, I am waiting.. based on experience the challenge is simple, write from your heart remembering GOD is your source, inspiration is the goal, and fun is the aim. Cheers fam. OOOssshhheeeeyyyy... have you guys heard Feeling the Nigga remix by D'Banj with Akon? Chisos! Its frosh like that. Oya bye.. My Manager e haf come. xx