**walks in singing… This isn’t goodbye, even as I watch you leave.... this isn’t god byeeeeee… aswear I wont cry, even as tears fill my eyes… aswear I won’t cryyyyyy.. **cleans lone tear.. Okay Cutt!!! Ladies and gentlemen of the #YnCGang, this is supposed to be a very emotional and “gimme a handkerchief” kinda mushy mushy resignation post.. as I feel so sad to leave.. Bet before I resign, lemme first play small nah **Winks.. Sooo…. Turn up Turn up Ladies and gentlemen **In Sophies Voice.. What Gwaning?! How was the mushy Mushy Valentine’s day celebration?! Hope beds were rocked?! Roses were shared?! Proposals were made?! French kisses were made?! **Winks @ Mzz Sykik, Moby and Ausserehl.. Hope yall had madt fun oh!!! and that was how some people went to flex and forgot about me Cc Mother.. Please did anybory help me and see my Egbon Toinlicious?! Just in case anyone did ehn, please kindly help me tell her that **In Wajildas voice… it is over between me and her, inshort we are quarreling! Aha nah! What Hapin ni?! She just did me appear-disappear like a Rainterghost on vals day and didnt even send me a text all through.. **crying in French.. Egbon thats not fairrrr… Aswear Egbon ko da rara oh! You just left me in the cold! did is say Cold.. No!! I mean in the Lagos heat just like that.. So you turned up with Oga boss and forgot about me ba?! Issorait, my god will judge you you will see.. **In my 7 year old voice, I will not play with thee again. So how was your Vals celebration gang.. **Clears throat.. Some people were Anti-Love Nwantinin oh! And were saying on Instagram that they would rather be voting.. Cc the beautiful and awesome Esther Koko.
So the beautiful delectable and wonderful plus BEAUTIFUL again Sophie and I would like to say a ghen ghen Thank you to you wonderful people for turning up for our
wedding :P Valentine’s day
post **Whispers.. Kai I like that child ehnn iTrip.. She is amazing aswear and she is wife
material 20 yaards :) … it meant a lot to us, and we just kept
chatting about it on Vals day.. Your comments were wonderful.. Sophie is
really smart ba?! Sheybe I told y’all she was, and you were busy calling me
Drycleaner up and down :(?! Please in case you missed the Love to be loved post, kindly see the wonderful Sophies Post
here and my craze man confused post here.. Okay.. my
valentine’s day was confusing.. First off there was no power all Saturday and
no power in crazy Festac means no water, and no water means you are officially (pardon
my terms, but its true) fucked up :(. So I had to spend the better part of the day trying to figure out my life,
and Voala.. the god of cupid then thought it wise to shoot an
arrow at my confused heart.. and I chose
to surprise Ribena with a box of chocolates, a Rose flower and some cards. Sheybe i tried small nah #feelingLikeAHelplessromantic.. And when
I was handicapped the delectable Raleeyat came to my rescue **Shines teeth.. Later at night, Ribena called me on the phone
and was just awwwwing and awwwwing all through.. That lady is such a sweet
heart ehn.. Y’all need to meet her.. **Whispers Insha Allah, I am counting down
to the Abuja trip.. I plan to shock her like Nepa wire.
Oya back to my resignation. **enters sad mood back.
The Young and Confused Blog.
Somewhere in Festac Town,
P.O Box 1991_11
16th February 2015.
The General Overseer.
Woman Wrapper Association International.
South Africa (the capital of flexing **Winks)
P.O Box 419
Cc. The Grand commander Lagos Branch.
Dear Your Royal highness of the woman wrapper kingdom.
Letter of Resignation
I Duru John de Beloved a perpetual woman wrapper duly inducted under the decree “Pursue woman till you die” under section 1211 subsection 91 write this letter of resignation from my woman wrapper status.. I will like to inform you that the wahala that has come (especially Watsapp wahala) to me because of pursuing woman like ant pursuing sugar has been detrimental to my dreams of hitting Naira 10M before I am 25, and getting married before I am 27, and to this reason I think I wanna resign jari.. **I haf tire. and the high blood pressure that comes with chasing women is becoming too much for my small heart as Egbon Clara always says, plus my eyes have seen shege shege, kai! Before I do so sha, I would like to reminisce on the good the bad and the ugly side of our journey thus far.
Do you remember June 2009, I think I was 18 then.. When we met that child that was very very very very very beautiful on FACEBOOK, that had long flowing hair on FACEBOOK, that had a Agbani Darego smile to die for on FACEBOOK, that I knew for sure she was the one all on FACEBOOK as there she looked like an angel that fell from the sky… Mehn remember how she was everything I wanted and some more back then sir?! But remember the surprise we had when we met her in real life with no long Hair, not a very very very very very fine face, and to realize the Agbani smile was camera induced.. I Remember meeting her later on to realize that all the Facebook package na wash, and all the long flowing hair was Attchee! My I cried, and It broke me baje baje.. I remember how I you went to bed later that night and saw her pursuing me in my dream with broom like APC people :( and how i called off the toasting immediately i woke up. Well I guess it was the fear of dating a “Facebook fine geh that caused that nightmare.
Do you remember that Babe we went to Crunchies Ikenegbu Owerri with?! The one we met on ABC bus in 2010, The FUTO one that was all mushied up and lovey dovey cuddly touching bory on the bus with me? The girl you were forming motivational speaker and Fela Durotoye for? Well I finally went out with her. Remember how I told you that all I had was Naira 1000 in my wallet on that date, and how I used it to buy her Sausage and Fanta
(Glass Bottle not plastic oh).. Kai I remember
how she sized me from head to Toe as we spoke and looked at the Pam sandal I
borrowed… Kai! I Remember how she said I will call you once I get back to FUTO,
but that was story for the gods, as till now she never even flash me sef **crying in Spanish.. I
wish she knew how I cleaned my room hoping that I would bring her back there to
get some ghen ghen action, I wish she knew how I had discharged all my neighbors
so nobody would come knock on the door when the room would be turned to a choir
ground.. Smh I wish she knew where I was going and what I would become, she would
have not despised humble beginnings. It i well.
But how can I forget the good… How can I forget Wajilda the child that made me smile everyday, the child that looked up to me, that believed in me, that never asked me for anything than for me to be me, and to be the best me I could be for us two. How can I forget to state about a child that I really loved with an anticipation to get married to regardless that marriage was still in 4 years time… How can I forget how we would quarrel at night and the next day she would call me saying “even though I am still mad at you ehn, I just wanna know how you are and be sure you are not dead yet”… How I miss her.
In the light of the above, I write to inform you that I tender this Resignation not cause I am tired of chasing women
I mean thats impossible as my blood dey boil, but cause I want something better for the woman I am currently
chasing, I want to be fully owned by Ribena and be hers to make or break, I want
to Love her and be loved by her fully.. I want her to be who I speak to before
I sleep and when I wake up, I want her Picture to be my display picture on
Instagram, Facebook, BBM (that I hate), Watsapp, and even LinkedIn sef, I want
her to know that I am all hers and nobody elses.
In the light of the above, please accept my resignation but as per FIDIC, kindly note that client reserves the right to claim for any cost incurred due to demobilization from these locations and re-mobilization at a later time to do these works (sorry gang, I had to add that, na our office style of saying to the client; “You gonna pay sucker’”).
Do be assured of our highest consideration,
With Highest Regards,
Duru John de Beloved.
Buiti! Please has anybory met this child?! She is Beautiful.. Choi! Seeing Buiti's picture alone makes me wanna commit
and the sin of Lookery with my eyes..
She is smart, outstandingly witty and has a heart of a mother as each time she
comes to the YnC blog yeah, she never
fails to ask how I am, and that always touches my soul… Having that she is a blogger, her fan base no
be here oH! I am sure that her page views are almost a million sef..
Ehen! Did you guys know that my Mama has almost 2 Million page views.. **dies
and wakes up! Chisos! 2 million! Will I ever get that much before I resign from blogging.. Oya ngwa ngwa Nonso, lerrus work harder to become like mama.
Ice: Now Ice is my brother, my friend and my day 1 Nigga.. who always has my back and never fails to support me.. Although he likes to follow me to drag woman sha **Tongue out, one thing I sincerely love about Ice is the fact that he is a true brother to the core and obviously one of the true friends I will have here on Blogsville.. I mean he and Mannie always have my back like Kilode, and it touches my heart to see brothers support one another and have each others back at times of Gobe.. Thanks Bruvs! Ice is a fashion blogger that has an immense style, plus his game is sooo on point! Twale baba
Ralleyat! Lemme just say that Raleeyat owns my heart today and always and there is nothing that child will ask for that I will not do.. Even if she says JdB toast a mad person, I will! okay #naPlayoH! Raleeyat is loving, beautiful, amazing in every sense of the word, and she makes me smile with every chat.. Plus her voice can tempt me for Africa ssshhhhaa… Chisos.. She helped me Play Romeo last weekend and to that i say Thank you Bubba, i wont forget it in a hurry. If you are reading this baby mi, I just want you to know that my heart is a place that you will never leave, and I love you to the ends of the earth and back.. After toasting you like this, please comment oh heheheh **Blows french Kiss your way... **In Lagbajas voice.. Where ever You are Parara(blowing trumpet).. wherever you be parara baby baby babe you never far awayyyyy…. you are always on my mind.
Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time great Young mind, you are why we write and the only reason why we hope to inspire… My prayer for you is that this week shall give you series of reasons to sing… **In Korede Belo’s Voice… I don get Alert #GODWIN and the crowd goes Ooooosssseeeehy!.. Kai Korede has all the girls on Instagram drooling for him oh! I think I need to resign from this power coy and start singing. **Wears Mr. Nigeria smile… Cheers.