Thursday, 25 June 2015

#FeatureThursday_ Stay with me... by Blessing Ehiz.

Osssheeeey Turn uP! Yo YnC Gang! how are weeee?! Permit me to introduce someBoRRy very special to you.. She is kick starting the Feature Thursday as inspired by MariamOre.... So today on Feature Thursday yeah.. We have my very own sweet heart... and one of the gehss I have been tripping for since I met her.. **covers face.. Trust me.. She is gonna blow ya mind away with this ghen ghen post.. Yep!! She bad like that.. and the crowd goes Yeeeeaaahhh mehn!

My experience so far in life has been quite like a football match, not knowing what the outcome would be but knowing that you can enjoy the game while it lasts, play a part in it and also bet on the outcome of a few experiences. But then the story of my life so far is not the reason why I am up at 1:00am writing this article.

In recent times, I have had the opportunity of watching a lot and I mean a lot of wedding movies, I have my roommates to blame for that. I am normally an action movie person, but these days, oh well! weddings have been the main “bane” of my day. This coupled with the fact that I have a well-established make-up artiste as a close friend “ELLAPINKETTE” so I get to see pictures of her works on brides and their trains especially when they appear on the popular BELLANAIJA.

Now, I know every woman’s dream is to one day end up with the right guy, settle down and have kids and live happily ever after without any interference from extended family, but I beg to say that this only exists in our fantasies. I have questions, as I have seen only a few happy marriages, and by a few, I mean, I can count on only one hand.

I want to fall in love, get married, have kids of my own etc. but what happens when the man I love, father of my kids.. What happens when he stops loving me back?! It would be foolhardy to say that love sustains a marriage as statistics have shown that love only carries a marriage as far as its 7th year, and that is best case scenario, and from then on is tolerance.

In one of the movies I was saddled with, the husband met a woman who he was in love with from high school and with whom he had lost contact with and trust me, she was hotter, classier, richer than his wife and no sooner than they had met, he started to rethink his marriage… This was a man who converted from Christianity to become a Jew just so that he could win the heart of his wife while they were courting, someone whose wife never nagged, who waited up for him during his late night rendezvous with the other woman without as much as a complaint (by the way, I would never do this, my quick temper, impatience and love for sleep won’t let me lol), she was a total darling and all he could pay her back with was asking for a divorce. Imagine the pain I felt watching this movie, of course I know it isn’t real and it is far worse in real life with best case scenario being that the moment a man starts keeping late nights, the woman starts nagging because she knows something is wrong but she just can’t quite put her finger on it and then ends up pushing him away the more, or worst case scenario being that the man beats his wife on countless occasions and parades the mistress in her face.

Bring it down to the dating level shall we?! On a daily basis, we meet guys who want us for reasons best known to them, some we are able to detect are players, others, we fall head over heels in love with. I have had a guy leave me because of a new girl he met, I mean, this is someone with whom I went through a lot, who I did a whole lot for, someone who was supposed to be my backbone in times of crisis, someone I could give an eye for if asked to, but no, he met someone new and off he went, to make matters worse, I found out later that he was asking out a friend of mine while we were together. You can’t begin to imagine the agony I went through. Let’s say my case is not strong enough, I met this girl who dated this guy for 8 solid years. Not 1, not 2, not 3, 8!!! and the guy left her and went on to this new girl who is not half as classy as his old girlfriend was. I can hear you say, it might have been the girl’s fault but I know this guy cheated on her while they were together even though everyone overlooked it because they felt she was the "iyawo" and we made sure to never tell her about it. But then it was on one of such flings that he met this new girl who he left the "iyawo" for. She stood by him when the goings were tough, she met him when they were both nobodies and followed him through the hustle, and when he was made, he dumped her, just like that! The girl is still struggling to get over it. Sad isn’t it?!

I have to ask what the problem is. What is it with guys and why can’t they just stay with one woman who is giving her all and who they have at one point claimed to love. Of course we have our flaws, mine being that i don’t trust any man on earth's surface, but I know to give my man the benefit of doubt and not to listen to hearsay and to give him a 2nd and a 3rd and a 4th and a 5th chance if he *fucks*up… at least then it would be known that I at least tried.

We definitely won’t cheat on you guys, we have given up a lot of seemingly better guys out there, just to be with you and believe me you are worth it so don’t put us through the stress of having to even worry about if you are with someone else. And to married men, please remember when u first met her and how you promised your all… and know that she said yes to you not just because she loves you but because she needs you and you leaving her would break her.


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  1. Nice make up. Love love love.... In the end you can't force people to stay and the truth is sometimes we can't always stay, we just have to move on.

  2. Seriously girl, just keep leading the squad! This has being the big topic on my mind, guys are just natural polygamists as their biological feature defined them but that is why there are control mechanisms that balance our body hormonal responses and all that. And mind is the greatest treasure of a human, only if we discipline it. Most men just feel relaxed thinking they are enjoying their life but it's so sad. Also, women are always the enemies of women.

    But I love u dearie though it's being long u've called me. You writing is so amazing.

    1. Ah!!! No oh!!! ImpossiCANT... Kai Nike I loF you oh... but nna mehn iayam not letting you finish guys on here oh... do you know how hard it is to be a guy?! Do you understand our Hormones?! You ladies think we cheat and play around just cause we want to... No oh!!! We do so cause it's hard to control it.. Hian Nike... **wears straight face... don't get me started oh.. Hehehehhehe Thank you for reading Baby mi... You do know that you are my Day 1 TFA crush nah.. **blushes and then **covers face...

  3. This is a great one.. I am beginning to believe the saying that men it is in their nature to cheat.
    Plus your makeup is unique honey.

  4. Hiya Gang... I for one believe you guys are over genralizing this cheating thing... but wait oh.. lemme ask a kind kweshion may I?! Please is it only guys that fall outta love with their wives?! Is it only guys that tolerate their wives?! Haven't you awesome ladies seen and heard of the reverse being the case too?! Like I stated in my reply to the ever sexy Nike... It's hard for guys cause our hormones are raging... I mean ladies can stay faithful and all that.. but for us... It's a really difficult shi... That's why it's best to not marry outta love nor lust... but Friendship... think about it Gang... Friends will respect eachother... NO MATTER what....

    When I get married... will I cheat?! DEFINITELY!!! But that I decided to marry a lady means I must not only like her.. But adore her aswell... It eeezz well biko... Cheers Gang..

    This was a frosh post Ehiz... Thanks for coming over to the YnC gang... You frosh like that... and the crowd goes OooosssShhhhheeeey Turn uP...

  5. Tell me about the nature of men to cheat... I just saw "splice" d guy cheated on his wife with an alien like clone

  6. Tell me about the nature of men to cheat... I just saw "splice" d guy cheated on his wife with an alien like clone

  7. First, i'll like to thank you all for your comments, thanks for taking out time to read. I agree with Nike and Gloria's comments... guys are naturally cheats!!!...what pains me is the way they are shameless about it. Like i said, i dont trust every and any guy, they are all d same...but like Duru said, dat is why it pays to marry your friend, someone that you can become besties with...then, it would be so hard for things to go south in your relationship.
    Nike i love you too and i am so sorry i havent checked up on you. Pls accept my apologies

  8. Nice come up, and great advice and perspective indeed. Women seem to have this misconception about men being monsters, but when one truly gets to the root of the matter, there will exist underlying issues relating to how men have also been in not so good relationships. That is not to say cheating is a good thing though. It simply mirrors a lot of things.

  9. U have been tripping for too many gehs!! Off to read the article.....

  10. and duru awaz trips for a lotta gehs.... love, love, love.....i'm one of the persons that tink LOVE IS ENOUGH... maybe its because i know the only man that can love you effectively is one who has an understanding of Gods love... love won the battle over 2000 years ago on the still wins any battle now...
    and oh, somefimes both gender jus need to purge themselves off this mindset of one or the other being monsters...

    She remembers the moment. The photographer took her picture. She remembers her anger. The man was a stranger. She had never been photographed before. Until they met again 17 years later, she had not been photographed since. The photographer remembers the moment too. The light was soft. The refugee camp in Pakistan was a sea of tents. Inside the school tent he noticed her first. Sensing her shyness, he approached her last. She told him he could take her picture. Read A life revealed

  11. Yeee!!! It's official, Duru hates ugly girls!!! At least I see him rolling with them beauriful hot babes in town. Nice touch girl, where you actually tryna advice Duru with style, girl don't be afraid you can even call him out openly and ask all the questions above. You know what.?.. men will always be men.

  12. Like seriously? It is normal for men to cheat....that's their believe. To some, it starts with a close relationship with a girl even when they know they've got a girl, they keep it cool and watch the new relationship flow. I've had an ex who told his friend I'm jes that sorta girlfriend. Omo, my head went gbishgbish when i saw that. I reacted when I saw that, talked countless times abt same girl. It got to a point, just as adenike said, I led the squad....cheated on him with someone far better and made sure I didn't play hide and seek(I gave him d opportunity to know I did that). Guess what? Nigga confessed he knew he led me to it but before then, I was done with him within me, it just pain me sey I no waste him time....the best thing is for ladies to shine their eyes. Shikina
    And no! I wont be ashamed to drop my bloglink :

  13. Duru is the number one polygamist. Nice post Blessing.