Tuesday, 1 September 2015

Are you Friends with Yesterday?! By H&M

Hello pals?? Happy September! Yyyyyyyaaaaayyy!!! *Dancing Shoki*.. KereSimeSi AKA Christmas is coming.. Can you Smell Christmas in the Air?! :) How have you guys been??? Its your Girl the Anonymous H&M, and mmehn I really apologise for being MIA all this while.. Please how many of us agree that JdB is a HARD Human being to work with?! If you do, biko raise your hand. That my Aburo ehhnn! Some times I feel like squeezing the life outta him… I am soorrrrryyy for being away all the while. But I am here now.. and that counts right?! So lets make LoF shall we?! *Get your minds outta the gutter* My absence was cause I have had my plates full these past weeks, plus JdB is just annoying and I mean it… *Wears Straight Face*..

I have two issues that have been bothering my mind. I know that you guys are kuku very smart so you can help me out.. However, for time sake, I will state them but we will deliberate on just one for now and maybe some other time, talk about the other.. So Deal?! The issues are as follows;

    1. Is it cool to still be friends with your ex- es even when you are in another relationship or probably engaged (or even married)???

         2. How okay is it to make new friends and meet new acquaintances that are of the opposite sex when you are in a relationship??? I won’t explain this second issue cause its not part of the discussion for the day so lemme leave it and go back to the first one…

‘Is it cool to still be friends with your ex- es even when you are in another relationship or probably engaged (or even married)???’

Yep!! You definitely read it correctly the first time.. *wicked grin*.. I entered one gbege with my fiancée over this matter.. Please I thought ex- relationship meant relationship that didn’t work out?! Does it necessarily mean friendship that didn’t work out?? Come to think of it, I am wondering What he was scared of sef?? That I would go back to my ex?? REALLY NIGGA????!!!!!

Allow me to borrow the Igbo expression- “tu fi a kwa”!! Please note that I don’t think of them as humans or nice folks? No!.. on the contrary, please don’t get me wrong.. They are, but we didn’t happen to bring out the best in each other while we were dating; hence, the expression in local parlance.. **Clears Throat..

“As e no work before, why e go work now?!”

I mean now that I have moved on (to probably someone able to bring out the best in me)??
Abeg o!!! I don’t get the logic behind the fear or whatever my fiancée is saying o.. someone please explain..

Oh!! I see you are probably wondering what I am saying.. Let me ask, please do you throw the baby out with the dirty water after washing him/her?.. As we well all, know this world is a small place.. Hence anything is possible! Let me paint this scenario to elaborate my explanation.. if you had a fiancé who was always insisting that all past relationships should stay dead, and this fiancé had an emergency that only your ex could help, would he/she not allow the ‘ex’ help, especially if it were on a no- condition basis?? See!! Let’s not deceive ourselves… Yeah I get you, anything could happen and so on.. Yes! I get that and I totally agree.. Life is complicated enough. Look! I'm not saying dine with the devil. If you know your resistance or self- control no reach, then leave it be. What I am saying is don’t close all doors completely and finally. Sounds like a bad advice?? Hear me out first please..

Life is too short and the world too small for you and I to know what will be of the other person tomorrow. Relationships are uncomplicated bonds that go wrong because we humans complicate it. This is quite acceptable only if you do not let a failed relationship ruin a great friendship. If the person is a treasure of an individual but relationship didn’t work out, why not just maintain cordial and civilised friendship?? No one knows tomorrow nah. If there is a way to remain plain friends with ex-es, what’s wrong in that?? If the friendship works, great!! If it doesn’t, no harm done!! KaPish..

If you must know team, 98% of the guys I have dated are great friends of mine till date. Choi!! I can see the clocks of your minds ticking, the calculators whirling and you puzzling over the total number I am referring to. Lmao.. leave that one for corner.. that one no concern una *tongue out*.. My own titbit of advice as I round up is this, keep friends rather than enemies; Open doors of love rather than close it, cause you don’t know which out of the friends kept you will need, and which door will be accessible to you when you knock.. LOBATAN O!!

So what do you think Pals?! Friends with the Ex.. Yay or Nay?!



  1. Well, I am of the school of thought that says you can be civil and still friends with your ex.

    1. I have missed this blog ooooo. I'm coming back - one sec

    2. True dat!! @calabar gal; I concur... after all, y not if not?? 👊..now let's try explaning that to my boo...! Gulps!🙈🙉🙊

  2. A friend of mine said setting recently after a phone conversation with my ex, she went all , Deb, you flow easily with your ex, I don't think I can with them. Truth is some of this exes are important people. Just so you may know, they even help you more after you've called it quits with them. Its not to win your heart back o, but I've noticed 5hat from my exes.

  3. This post made me laugh.
    Can I be friends with my ex? Yes! Because I can't be involved with anyone who wasn't my friend first.

  4. First all, happy September to you and the entire crew.
    To answer your questions, I believe there's nothing wrong in keeping in touch -especially if you get along so well, but that cannot be said for everyone I guess.

    If your current partner has issues with you keeping in touch with your ex, you might want to reduce your interaction to the barest minimum.

    Keeping friends or exes has its perks, in your case it keeps you well grounded and fits in with your personality. But at some point one just has to move on I think.


    1. Totally true!! However, one quick question, what if your partner does not even want barest minimum with any of your ex-es, and these peeps before u even dated were true friends; what wud u do??

  5. Yes and No... depends from the way you split ;)

    Greets from summerish Athens!


    1. Well said; what about the boo's angle??

  6. dere's nufffin wrong wif being friends wif ur ex o... as long as
    1. u still don't have feelings foe each oda
    2. both of u won't jus have dat random sex
    3. u guys broke up maturedly
    4. its not a threat to ur relationship.... no boo is ever going to be comfortable abt this ish same wif the ladies buh if its keep brimging issues btw me and my boo i will jus let the ex go jare... forget abt that ex ti being theonli one dat can help.... dere are many ways to kill a bird

    the MAD WOMAN that lived on my street

  7. Duru Duru!
    How's it going?
    This one you just dey wish me Happy New Month.
    Lol. You too Happy New Month.