Monday, 25 April 2016

#MyBachelorsDiary- Where is the Love?!


Turn up Turn up Ladies and Gentlemen.. Whats uP! Whats uP! Whatssss upppp!!!! Omo no jokes eh! Forget Heart Break eh! Nothing hurts more than when your account balance reads 0. 00 in any Currency at all.. But Worry not! Oluwa gats you.. Money wihh show... Can I hear an Ameenn someboRRy?! I’m Duru..  Whats good YnC Gang?! Whats been happening?! hafa hafa hafa! Omo like play like play eh.. I have been on sabbatical lori blogger eh! I feel so guilty to have been away.. but you know nah! **Wears Martin Luther King face.. There comes a time in a man’s life when he has to leave Blogger and Pursue woman :D Choi! I never hexspeRRed eet eh! To be away this long i mean.. I so hate been stale on gist! But oh! Well. Life! Aight.. with no much Adue.. lets dance shall we?!


So Insha Allah yeah.. I have been on a traveling spree in the last 3 weeks. Omo as you see me so ehnn.. **Adjusts Agbada :) Every day on my Visa must be maximized to the fullest ehh! Biko.. Omolomo cannot come and goan sleep on top of Keke lori Obodo Onyibo :) lemme maximize this waka to the maximum- maximum. So in the light of my Traveling Spree; I got to meet Calabar geh of Destiny and the crowd goes Yyyyyaay! 1st off lemme quickly tehh you that Calabar geh is too cool for school yo!  I mean no jokes eh! She is a sexy someboRRy for days **cleans Sweat.. I mean Ogbono Feli-feli kinda hot! annnndddd she drives an Aeroplane.. I mean her car can send Text message nah.. How much cooler does it get?! You know all these ghen ghen onyibo cars that can do Back flip ba?! Eheenn.. that’s the kinda car she drives #TeamBadAss :).. No doubt eh! She is boss like that.
 
Buckingham palace

Please be informed Gang.. that I have officially Kissed Dating good bye **cleans lone tear..  And I think I mean it this time Ifaye!! . Lemme gist you why! A couple of Days ago.. I used the hard earned money that my Father sent me to survive to go to London instead. Please be informed that London to Coventry is like Lagos to Benin.. hence if I tried to Trek it as usual.. na 5 days journey by Legedis benz be that heheh.. So I Buss'ED' it.. and I was so excited. Now prior to my meeting with this geh.. me and the babe had been doing loff lori Whatsapp ati Mail for almost 2 years now.. and I like to think that the geh e haf trip for me pata pata like  butter lori bread. You trust me nah Gang.. when my head is correct.. I can speak fine fine English for daysss nah.. so all my messages had been bursting her head on Gmail and WhatsApp and lo when I met her.. I was in for the shock of my life.. Inshort I realised that “Its not by Beauty alone”


Its beyond me how people can seem arrogant.. and feel like the world is theirs.. it is beyond me how a geh just because she is fine like mami water and has a body like Beyonce.. fails to look at others with a lens of Beauty as well :(. it is funny how a geh simply because she speaks like someone who has Hot yam in her mouth hence the many many Phonetics she spews.. will look at a full grown 24 years 166 Days old fine boy like Duru with his 3 dimple.. 5 Muscles.. 6 Packs.. monstache and swag et al.. and stand up and leave the lunch table.. and then its hit me that the geh has failed to realize that "Love is Blind!”

Source- www.quotesgram.com

I must confess sha.. I creeped her out a little. Sadly before I met her.. I was having a Burger King on the train.. and lo when I met her.. apparently I had something on my nose.. Embarrassingmoment101.com! But my kweshion is what happened to all those love scenes in Onyibo movie that the geh will see a guy that looks broke and love him still.. what happened to all those scenes that a girl will choose to be with a guy regardless of what she sees on the surface? What happened to taking a “leap of faith?!” I was talking to some one when i went to London Last weekend.. and she said.. "Duru.. You are too Razz" heheh and then it hit me.. that if you cannot like me for the Razz that I am now.. you will not cherish me enough for the Tush I will become :).



Mehn no jokes oh Gang.. I thought getting a geh friend in Nigeria was HARD WORK! Trust me.. that one na Child's play in comparison to what my eyes have 'saw' hia! because apparently yeah.. Many girls in the UK think that you want to date them only for profit and not for love.. and I am like come on!! Because I don’t have money at 24 does not come and goan mean that I will not jam money when I hit 25 now! Abeg they need to chill.. Cause look me.. look me well well.. “This is not my real face oh”


Thank you for investing the last 7 minutes of your time in my life gang.. Don’t worry.. my Brain is clearing small small.. The woman wrapper is leaving.. the confusion is cleaning.. hence I promise to make you knowing me personally worth it.. I promise to make you proud.. I will love you forever real real... Yes.. YOU!


Y’all do me a great Honour with your time.. and my prayer for ye this week is simple.. May ATM Machine not swallow your card on Friday Night when you go to Turn up with bae.

Blessings!

Instagram; @youngandconfusedafrica


#Udo #ItcanonlybeGOD

Friday, 22 April 2016

My Moby :)



Whoop! Whhoop! I am so excited about this great initiative.. Omo no jokes oh! aYam Turning Ghost on Blogger **Cleans lone tear.. EEz Obodo Onyibo that cause it :).. But FIa not my people **Shines Teeth! lemme Romanticize you with Hope and aFFecShion! and say that aYam still hia!!! I am just justing just  hehehe.. 

So my Friend and Geh friend for days opened a Beauty Parlour.. and aYam hexScited.. You see ehn YnC Gang.. Eezz not a joking something's' to go from Blogging to beautifying.. So MobyKOKO is definitely a lady of many hats.. And so bam!! Feast ya eyes on her Store of Life.. Dear Future geh Friend... Fia not! Our Wedding make up go be free.. :) Considering that is Moby.. me sef wihh Rub Dustin Powder that day.. as long as she Touches my face :)

P.S: Eheeenn I went to London to see a geh! Did i gist you?! Hmmnn.. I used my Fathers money to goan come and see geh and she gave me Ella.. Inshort.. I give up.. I kissed Dating Good Bye **Cleans lone tear :(


*****************************

As dawn gave way for daylight, the rays pierced through the window curtain and landed on my face, bringing an end to what was a mixture of a rather pleasant but somewhat uncomfortable sleep (Nepa was asleep all night too...LOL).We all know there’s never a Saturday that doesn’t come with at least 5 owanbe’s for a regular person.


Hmmmn ..Do you all know the price of every makeup product in the market has increased? (No thanks to this dollar wahala) I did not know oo (as I ain't a make-up artist). As in, I opened my make-up purse and it was crying for help. Now that ordinary foundation is competing with Nepa bill, how would I buy? My purse had nothing but a smelly lip-gloss that hadn’t been touched since my friend dashed me last year Christmas and I had less than two hours to get ready for a wedding and also for a movie premiere at Oriental Hotel that evening. I had to look my best (age is no longer on our side and oluwa needs to provide a boo ASAP).


So, I called my makeup artist friend to ask if I could come for a free makeover but she had hustled off....Shuu!. I then Decided to drive round Ikeja to see if I could get a good bargain for makeup items or a miracle ....As I veered off Awolowo road in Ikeja on to Fadeyi street, just after one Holy Trinity Hospital, I saw a huge sign board with a very pretty lady pristinely made up. Immediately, I was sold!, I had to look like that lady.


On the banner, there it was, in bold... Moby Impressionz make-up studio.. I parked in the compound, made my way upstairs and as I walked in, behold a haven for make-up artistry. I did not only get my make up immaculately done, I registered for their regular make-up classes so I don’t have to get stuck again.........


....That’s the story......

The Fact...
Moby Impressionz make-up studio is now open and running at No. 1 Fadeyi Street (beside holy trinity Hospital), off Awolowo road, Ikeja. Everything make-up is available just for you and to your taste.

Our services include;
·         Bridal / bridal party Make-up
·         Instant make –over
·         Regular / daily look
·         Gele
·         Traditional make-up
·         Movie / cinema make-up

We also have regular classes / training in make-up artistry, helping interested persons become professional make-up artists.


For enquiries:
Call +234-8087646638, +234-7011209592
Blog: www.mylifeasmoby.com
IG @mz_moby

 
Congratulations Moby-Koko.. My BAe is baDDest :)

#Udo #ItcanonlybeGOD

Monday, 18 April 2016

Y? by #BLUE... The event that was :)



#BLUE- acronym for Born Leaders Under Enlightenment is simply a coalition of African youths poised to make an impact in the younger generation to the highest degree possible. The brain child of four 23 year old's which started in 2015 is gradually growing into not just a Bug of positivity.. but a vibe.. an ideology.. a way of life.

As a coalition, they aim to achieve their mission by organizing road show campaigns and Teenage based programs.. with the prime intention of both exciting and Teaching Teenagers based on the facilitators growing up experiences... and GOD'S inspiration.
 

All together.. the activity was loads of fun and.. Mehhnnn forget English biko.. I am not a dictionary biko **Shines Teeth.. In the light of the above introduction of Destiny.. Insha Allah yeah.. #BLUE held their 1st event for the year 2016 and it was a ghen ghen success.. I mean no jokes sam sam.. it was lit to the friGGing tee yo!!! Oluwa was involved.

Please see below picSHurs of what went down!


The ghen ghen @walase The Host with the Most :)

My super Duper Ipheoma of BellaNaija came through yo!!! :)

Key Facilitator- Ifeoma Nkem Gbemudu dishing it as e dey hot

Cross section of participants.. Why so serious Biko?! :)

Anddd we just had to say "Thank you" to whom Gratitude was due- Their Pastor being Appreciated :)- To Be a Pastor eezz not a joking Sturvzz sam sam oh!

Yess Boss!! Newest Member of #TeamBLUE yo!!- Oga Boss Micheal Bright :)

From L-R- Our beautiful ghen ghen super sweet Tolu Habib, The Ghen Ghen Micheal Bright, The Super Abidemi Ehiwere (Guest Speaker), the Host Pastor- Pastor Olamide, Our Key Facilitator- Ifeoma Nkem Gbemudu, our President of Destiny Ike Sarah Chika , and our Grande Commander of Aye Isioma Omuojine

In Isioma's words- "BLUE.. Small Team Big Dream :)"

Smile- JESUS loves you.
Instagram: @_blueafrica

#Udo #ItcanonlybeGOD

Wednesday, 13 April 2016

#BLUEAfrica presents.. "Y?"



#BLUE Acronym for Born Leaders Under Enlightenment is a coalition of young African minds poised to make a positive lasting impact in the lives of as many African teenagers as reachable. Established in 2015, our mission in BLUE is Touching, Inspiring and impacting the lives of Teenagers to create a better future, guide them in the right path, and encourage & challenge them to become stronger men and women who would make a difference and impact their generation positively.   We believe that if young people stand for what is right from their foundational years, then Nigeria and even Africa at large has a shot at becoming a better place. To draw us closer to achieving our mission, we have organised social, inspirational and educational events facilitated by well seasoned speakers in different locations. We intend to continually create impacts via our events, seminars and gatherings. 


To kick up the Quarterly Campaign for the year 2016, #BLUE has planned and organised an event tagged “Y?!” This event was born out of the need for answers to the barage of questions in the minds of today’s teenagers.

Considering past experiences of the team members of BLUE, they understand that many young people are faced with daily challenges, thoughts and questions which they cannot answer. Sometimes they wonder why things are not working out as they had planned it; Sometimes they wonder why life is unfair, etc.  Eventually, when they do not have answers to their questions, nor do they have anyone experienced enough to confide in, they are prone to making wrong decisions and ending up with the wrong answers and scars. 

At #BLUE, we understand that many young people are in dire need of acceptance, hope and many are in search of a simple voice of Reasoning, and it is on this premise that “Y?” was born. A teenage Talkshow poised at listening to questions directly from these teenagers verbally or anonymously and providing them with answers. An interactive Teenage talkshow with flavour and swagger :)


As the first in a rising series of many- Y? 2016 focuses on issues relating to the Home Front, negligence on the parts of siblings and elder guides, neglect by guardians, Child and sexual abuse, violence and hurt all as affecting Teenagers.


This event is scheduled to involve the participation of over 60 Teenagers and will be facilitated by well seasoned and Adroit Speakers including; Ms. Ifeoma Nkem Gbemudu- Motivator, Leader, Social Media Enthusiast and Organizing member of at the “Becoming” series and Mr. Abidemi Ehiwere- Photography enthusiast, IT Specialist, and Teenage pastor at the RCCG.

The event is slated to be loads of fun and have series of activities. So if you are around the environs or choose to travel through the seas, Please pop in and see things pop. :)


For more information- please contact the Team Lead for Project “Y?!” 2016 Ms. Toluwalase Habib on  +2348064636264, follow their activities on Instagram at; @_blueafrica and for further inquiry about #BLUE please contact the President: Ike Sarah Chika at: sarahdi4u@yahoo.com


#Udo #ItcanonlybeGOD


Monday, 4 April 2016

#MyBachelorsDiary: Samson or Delilah?!


Picture Source: www.facebookcom (Duru John d Beloved) and www.google.com

**Adjust Sit.. Turn up! Turn uP! Ladies and Gentlemen.. **Singing in Bebe Bexa’s and G Easy’s voice... WoooHooo Its just me myself and I, Solo Riding till I die.. Cause I.. Got me for life.. :) How are you Gang?! How was the weekend?! What’s the frigging 411 Team?! What gwan Fam?!! Its spring Break Babayyy!! So as you see me so ehnn.. The plan for this Monday toh ghen ghen ju Friday lo is; Sleep.. Sleep and more Sleep.. I mean this is the life Baby :p.. Hope you guys had madt weekend fun oh! **Rubs Chin! I am thinking of Getting married once I am done with this degree.. I mean **Rubs Lower lip.. It is about time nah.. plus.. whats more to wait for.. A ti ri gbo gbo kini to wa ni aye yi! **That’s Yoruba #Decipher :)


So.. I am sorry for being AWOL in a while.. 2 reasons.. 1. I went Holidaying in Royston.. 2. I am getting less Confused (Which is good news for me and Bad news for my Blog :( ) and 3. (yeah yeah.. I know I said 2.. But is it your concern ni?! iKid )… I had to defend my Dissertation… Don’t ask me how come.. Just know that Insha Allah yeah.. My Defense was the friGGing Bomb! I mean it was an #ItcanonlybeGOD moment seeing Onyibo people of different races clap for small me.. I had that “Daddy..Daddy.. We made ittttt” feeling. **Cleans lip.

So.. Samson and Delilah! Not the perfect Love Story.. not the best Sex Story either… but one of the most detailed Love Sex Stories ever. You know.. it is a bit of our Typical “Boy Meets girl.. Boy Likes Girl.. Boy Toasts Girl.. Girl Blushes.. Girl Agrees.. Boy MUMU’S for girl.. Boy Sleeps with Girl… Boy MUMU’s for girl again.. Boy Loses super Power".. Case closed. Samson and Delilah! A tale of Lust.. Mushy MushyNess and deception.



As I wrote the above paragraph.. I am tempted to ask how Samson can Mumu 2 times for the same woman and not see Whats up! and then it hits me like trailer that Time and Time again I have done even worse.. So if I saw Samson’s case as strange.. Then I would have to see me.. myself and I as same. 


All my life In Nigeria.. I have chased after women.. More like all my life after Uni i.e 20-24+… and now.. Here! In a strange man’s country with no rules as to Love and Mushy Mushyness (Apart from the Don’t do Under 18 rule) I am tempted to seem like a shark in the midst of Titus Fishes.. but thinking deeper on the subject of Samson and Delilah keeps me with many many thoughts in my head. Who was right and who was wrong?! Who was the reason Samson lost his strength and fell from his Height of Excellence and respect?! Who was Victim and who was Victor?! Who was Super Hero and Who was Villain?!

Growing up to the tale of Samson and Delilah.. I was always mad at Delilah! "Aha! See as the babe just came and went and destroyed my guys destiny" I always thought to myself hehehe, but considering that I am in a case of many many Delilah’s now.. it has me realizing that it wasn’t Delilah who was really wrong.. It was Samson.. “Boy TOASTS Girl” remember?

In our world.. Many atimes; the female folk are usually at the receiving et abusive end of a tale of Lust gone Bad.. many atimes.. the guy is given the “He is just a guy Pass” when there are Sexual Escapades gone wrong. When Pregnancies occur.. the Woman has to bear the blunt and all.. But I have in this strange land of Sojourn and in the past weeks learnt otherwise. I have learnt that although it takes 2 to dance kokoma.. it takes 1 to initiate the dance :).. So as I sit here.. wondering what I am going to do with the next Pages of my Bachelor's diary.. I am forced to take note of the fact that… If I fall from the height from which i have so Gracefully and #ItcanonlybeGOD’ly climbed in all the years.. then it would not be the fault of the Fallee or Delilah.. but that of I the faller AKA the Samson.

Hheheheh I know this post must be absolutely confusing for someone new on here.. But just remember the name of the Blog and in **Toin’s Voice.. Wa wa alright.

Thank you for the past 7 minutes of your time Gang.. You do us a great Honor with it! My prayer for you in this new week is that You will shine Bright like a Diamond.. and that people will look at you and go..  OBO baDDest! Blessings!

Instagram: @youngandconfusedafrica


#Udo #ItcanonlybeGOD